Hey baby, you know what sounds good? You and me never speaking to each other again.
I just can't take the bad s*x anymore.
"Really, our time together has just become more effort than you're worth."
You’re the girl that everybody wants. Today is their lucky day.
How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the thin ice our relationship is on.
Hey girl, you must be a math book because you’re full of problems.
Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.
Is it hot in here or is this relationship suffocating me?
"It's not you...it's your taste in music"
Hey girl, are you a newspaper?
Because you get picked up by random guys on the bus.
Aside from being single, what do you do for a living?
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
Hey Pumpkin, I just wanted to say that I'm done with having Halloween every day.
"We are like a broken mirror. It is better to leave it broken than hurt yourself to fix it."
I think it would be hot if we f**ked other people. Exclusively.
It’s not you – it’s me. I don’t like you anymore.
We should make like your parents and split.
It's not you...it's your taste in music.
Are you an astronaut? Because I need some space.
What’s the difference between me and your socks? I’m not yours anymore.
Hey, baby. I'm calling myself Han because you need to be Solo.
Will you be the sun in my life? Then stay millions of miles away from me.
I think this has been said somewhere else.
Hey, remember back when we were a thing… Yeah… Good times.
I don’t know what I’d do without you, but starting tomorrow I’m going to give it a try.
Hey baby, are you in a tunnel? Because we’re breaking up.
"Remember when I asked you out? Well, I was talking to the girl behind you"
I see my future like how the Americans spell colour. Without u.
I think we need to become better strangers.
Do those legs go all the way? Because you should use them to go away.
Excuse me, I seem to have lost my phone number, can you do the same?
"Roses are red, Violets are blue. Garbage is dumped, now so are you."
I will always cherish my initial misconceptions of you.
"Do you believe in love at first sight? How about misery after three years?"
Hey babe do you need crutches? Cause I can’t stand you anymore.
We need to cover more ground so we should split up.
Are you a thief? Because you stole a year of my life.
"Hey babe, you heard of the movie 'Other people?'"
"Yeah, why?"
"I think we should see it."
"It's not because I don't like you, it's because I hate you."
The Best Break Up Lines
Want to know a joke? Our relationship.
Me: Did it hurt?
Her: Did what hurt?
Me: When the door hit you in the ass on the way out.
Hear that sound? (cup hand to ear) Yep- that's a dump truck, and it's coming for you!
Girl: Your ex is so attractive
Boy: Which one?
Girl: ME. Goodbye.
It's time to be like a kit-kat and split up.
Are you a dollar bill? Because you’re single.
Did we fall from the sky? Because we look pretty broken up right now.
My d**k is committed to you, but my heart is not.
"I now pronounce you dumped and single. You may now kiss my ass."
Whoa, Heaven must be missing an angel! Because you’re dead to me.
"I just can't take the bad lovemaking anymore".
"Look, our relationship is like doing push ups on your knees. It's just not working out"