Damn girl, are you a magician’s assistant? Because I want you to disappear from my life.
Knock knock. Who's there? You're - You're who? - You're single!
Roses are red
Violets are blue
You made my life a mess
Please call a clean-up crew
Are you a stop watch? Because our time is up.
Knock knock. Who's there?
You're.
You're who?
You're single again.
Hey baby, remember how you said that you can’t live without me? Well, it’s time to get your affairs in order….
Are you the dog? Because your shit’s all over the lawn.
Hey, babe. I think it's time we take our relationship to the previous level.
I just can't take the bad s*x anymore.
"I treated this relationship like my diet, one cheat day a week."
"Do you believe in love at first sight? How about misery after three years?"
You look like my future ex wife.
It’s not you – it’s me. I don’t like you anymore.
This relationship is kinda like the Superbowl LIII halftime show; I can’t wait for it to be over.
Did we fall from the sky? Because we look pretty broken up right now.
"You're perfect in every way, just not for me."
Roses are red
And you gotta go
Because I found out
That you is a ho.
Wanna see a magic trick? Abrakadabra, you're single now.
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
"Remember when I asked you out? Well, I was talking to the girl behind you"
I really like you. So does my wife.
Hey baby are you American cheese because you come as a single now.
Whoa, Heaven must be missing an angel! Because you’re dead to me.
It's not you...it's your taste in music.
Let’s make like an atom, and split.
Raise your hand if you have a boyfriend.
Not so fast
Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.
Hey babe, how about I plan a romantic weekend get away, and while I’m gone you can pack your shit and GTFO?
Are you dessert because I'm finished.
"This isn't easy and neither are you. I'm breaking up with you."
If you take the "L" out of LOVER. Its OVER.
I think it would be hot if we f**ked other people. Exclusively.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Girl its been fun
But im leaving you
Are you a parking ticket? Because you're evidence that I made a mistake.
It's time to be like a kit-kat and split up.
I think we need to become better strangers.
"The longer we are together, the less serious I am about you."
Excuse me, I seem to have lost my phone number, can you do the same?
Do you happen to know sign language? Because this is the last time you’ll hear from me.
Hey, remember back when we were a thing… Yeah… Good times.
"If it's meant to be it's meant to be....but just to be clear it isn't."
It’s a good thing we’re bad at puzzles because there is no way we’re putting this shit back together.
"You're not Mr. Right.... just Mr. Right Now."
Honey, I need you to cancel my subscription. I’m done with your issues.
I see my future like how the Americans spell colour. Without u.
We should make like the Soviet Union and split up.
What’s your sign? Mine is stop.
Roses are red, violets are blue, trash is dumped and so are you.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd rather be dead than continue seeing you!
Here, look at this blank piece of paper for a second… I wrote every reason why we should stick together on it.