Q. What did the bully do to the orange?
A. Beat him to a pulp.
I wonder why theatres are so sad? They're always dark, moody, and in tiers.
Who are the biggest fans at the theatre? The backstage crew - They're always giving props to the actors.
I went to a theater performance done on a bunch of dictionaries the other day...
It was a play on words.
The leech, who is good at drawing blood, applied for a job in an art gallery.
The Earth without 'art'...
....is 'EH'
Roses are red, violets are blue, I ain't no poet, but neither are you.
Q: What do you do with unruly green kids?
A: Make them do limeout.
Once I tried to paint the sky but I blue it.
When you meet someone, you don't want to get off to a bad art!
The painter wanted to feel the texture, so he buttered his toast with his fingers.
The most notorious one of all pirates was very sad. It may have been because he was Bluebeard!
In the paintball game, I shot a guy thrice. He dyed on impact.
Jack is a lovable man with a colorful personality. He is a great hue-man.
Why did the Lord of the Rings author get kicked out of the movie theatre.
He was Tolkien all the way through.
The painting was framed, so the cops arrested it.
Theater sound guys aren't always good speakers
Why did the artist go to the lounge? Because it was her comfort tone.
Did you hear about the painter who works in jail? They say he had a brush with the law.
What's brown and sticky? A stick.
Why did the artist have to go to the bathroom right away? Because when you gotta Van Gogh, you gotta Van Gogh.
Dreaming in color is the artist's pigment of imagination.
It's weird being colorblind in an art gallery. Everything's a pigment of the imagination.
Q. Why are orange jokes so dumb?
A. Because oranges are afraid to concentrate.
Which color is the fastest?
Red, because it is always redy.
I just found out that Mercedes is donating state-of-the-art street sweepers to some of the largest cities around the world to help fight littering.
They're calling it Mercedes-clenz.
Why are artists so temperamental? They have to get into the right frame of mind.
The sun's favorite color is ultraviolet. Apparently, it glows with everything.