A man named Martin Draw was campaigning for the Senate. He printed up shirts saying “I’m with Draw” to support his campaign. The next day, he wore the shirt to a tennis tournament. When he walked up to the tournament desk, the director handed him his money back and asked him why he couldn’t play.
The classiest indoor tennis facilities serve bubble tea.
Pick-up line: You might as well play be a tennis player, because I’m about to court you girl.
I used to hate tennis, but ever since I’ve started winning 6-0, I love it now.
An orange and an apple signed up for a tournament. No one was surprised to find out they were both seeded.
My friend Elmer’s has gotten really good at tennis ever since he stuck to a healthier diet and went glue-ten free.
I want to play my match outdoors so I can hit the ball higher in the air. I’m not good at persuading people, so I’m going to hire a lob-byist.
Most of your players never make it out of the lower-level tournaments. I highly doubt their Futures as a professional.
Fred is so condescending about my tennis strokes. I can’t take any more of his backhanded compliments.
They call me Ace, because you just got served.
If you want to impress the crowd, hit overheads. Every point will be a smash hit.
Native Americans used to have their own professional tennis tournaments, and provided free housing to players from other tribes. They called it the A Tee Pee Tour. (No disrespect to Native Americans!)
Is your eyesight as bad as your cell phone reception? Because that was a terrible call.
I’m a baseliner and I don’t know how to volley: my game would disappear if I went to no-man’s land.
I want to practice my forehand outside, but it will be wet in the morning and nice later on. So here’s the plan for today: inside-out.
Oh, I thought I was playing the first round, but I guess I got a free pass. Bye.
The injured player wanted to congratulate the winner, but he couldn’t walkover to the other side of the court.
Jack has a large neck so he decided to wear a bowtie to his wedding. Otherwise, he’d end up with a tiebreak.
Mary didn’t miss a first serve the entire match. It was not her fault she lost.
I wish they’d change the scoring system, but tennis is set in its ways and doesn’t see the point.
Is it ad-out again? I’m going to hit my breaking point.
Do you always play this badly at the net? Because I don’t like your approach.