What’s a real estate agent’s favorite song?
“For Lease Navidad.”
As one black bug, bled blue, black blood. The other black bug bled blue.
I am lucky we are hiking together this evening.
What do baby ghosts wear on Halloween? Pillowcases.
Zebras are just horses that escaped from prison.
Fir sure.
Where do crows go to get educated?
CAWlege
Why did the deer get braces?
Because he had buck teeth.
The bag of flour was so confused.He thought that he saw his friend the loaf yeast-erday.
What kind of tree fits in your hand?
A palm tree!
If we were playing tennis, I'd let you score all the points so I'll always be in love.
“The problem with doing nothing is that you never know when you’re finished.” – Groucho Marx
“If there is a WILL, there are 500 relatives.” – Anonymous
Who does their best work when they're under the weather?
Meteorologists.
"Learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t live long enough to make them all yourself."
~ Anonymous
Did you hear about the mother who gave birth to her baby while she was in the sky?
I guess you can say the baby was airborne
Why are super loud sounds bad for your ears?
It hertz your eardrums.
Girl sat on a swing.
Trying to sing a song for god.
Missing him, not me.
I've decided to marry a pencil.
I can't wait to introduce my parents to my bride 2B!
The color of the sky can help in predicting the weather. It gives a fair report of the hue-midity.
What do bees use to build roads? Nec-tar.
Why did Saint Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland?
They were causing mass hiss-teria!
"I whip my hare back and forth."
Hey, how'd you like to recreate the Big Bang?
When the drivers ran out of fuel in the grassland, they refueled their tanks with grass-oline!
Of all the girls I’ve seen on here, you’re at the top of m’Alice-t
What’s the best way to find a truly committed man?
Visit the closest mental hospital.
A mixture of black, white, and red usually refers to a panda who has experienced severe sunburn!
So, what do you turn into at midnight?
It was hot today and when I went outside I saw there was a line of guys standing outside the hairdressers. I thought to myself, "Such a lovely day to have a barber queue".
Why do people hate bee puns?
Because they don’t want to beelieve they are good
A friend of mine is his team's best footballer on paper. Unfortunately, they play most of their games on grass.
When should you stop for a glow worm? When he has a red light.
My friend had put some beans in the coffee grinder
After a few seconds I told him to stop. That's fine.
Picking strawberries can be a very fruitful endeavor!
I made a bridge out of Kleenex.
I have truss tissues.
I always have a souper time with you.
Q. What do you get when a swine artist mixes two colors together?
A. Pigment.
Did you hear about the zombie who was expelled from school?
He kept buttering up his teacher!
What do you call a fruit riding a motorcycle?
“An Orange County Chopper.”
I asked the land beside the ocean if he was certain he wasn't beach.
But he was pretty shore.
Why are winter days great?
They’re snow much fun!
I was wondering why the Frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me.
The baby beaver sang a song about the river in a video for his friends. He had a good flow.
You must be related to Alfred Nobel because baby you are dynamite!
I told my wife she drew her eyebrows too high...
She looked surprised.
My neighbor planted dogwood trees in his front yard.
I’m not a huge fan of the bark.
When were Medieval armies too tired to fight?
When they had a lot of sleepless knights!
Where do school-going vampires carry their books?
In bat-packs.
You spend so much time in my mind, I should charge you rent.
Go to BabaMail
