A man arrives at the pearly gates and notices a group of rich people in expensive suits fighting over a needle. One guy yells, "It’s my turn!" while another in a black baseball cap jabs himself repeatedly, shouting, "Ow, ow, ow!" The man turns to St. Peter and asks, "What’s going on over there?" St. Peter sighs. "Oh, that’s just the world’s richest trying to get into heaven." Confused, the man points at the needle. "Okay… but what are they doing with that?" St. Peter shrugs. "You know Mark 10:25, right? 'Easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter heaven'?" "Sure, but… where’s the camel?" St. Peter smirks. "We ran out. This seemed easier."

A man from the city was reporting for a job at a residential home and knocked on the door. The owner wasn't home, but his pet parrot was. "Who is it?", the parrot said. "It's the man from the gas company here to fix your pipes." There was no answer, so he knocks again. "Who is it?", the parrot said. "It's the man from the gas company here to fix your pipes.", said the man, starting to feel annoyed. There was no answer, so he knocks again. "Who is it?", the parrot said. "It's the man from the gas company here to fix your pipes...", said the man, starting to get a little angry. There was no answer, so he knocks again. "Who is it?", the parrot said. "It's the man from the gas company here to fix your pipes!", shouted the man, now quite furious. So furious in fact, that he suddenly had a heart attack and collapsed on the front stairs. The owners come home and are shocked to find a dead man on their steps. The wife says to the husband, "Well, who is it?" The parrot then replies, "It's the man from the gas company here to fix your pipes!"