Olive Jokes

Hummus Puns

What is the charge for beating someone with a bottle of olive oil and a can of chick peas ?
Attempted Hummus-ide.

Fire Puns

A french farmer who owned an olive plantation had a huge fire
He was extremely sad, he had lost his all his huile d'olive.

Love Puns

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Olive.
Olive, who?
Olive you, and I don’t care who knows it!

I love you with all my butt.
I would say my heart, but it is just not as big. (wink wink where my curvy booties at?!)

Puns

Where did the Terminator find extra olive oil??
Aisle B, back.

Rainbow Puns

Green seemed to disappear from the rainbow it came back in full force, olive and kicking.

Pea Puns

What is the charge for beating someone with a bottle of olive oil and a can of chick peas ?
Attempted Hummus-ide.