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onde onde calories Jokes

onde onde calories Jokes and more.
Air Travel Quotes
"I want to live in the world where searching for plane tickets burns calories."
Funny Health Quotes
"If the poor overweight jogger only knew how far he had to run to work off the calories in a crust of bread he might find it better in terms of pound per mile to go to a massage parlor."

- Christiaan Barnard
Alien Puns
What is a lightyear?
The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
Space Puns
What does someone mean by a light year? The same as a regular year, but with less calories and fat.
Funny Running Quotes
"If you run 100 miles a week, you can eat anything you want. Why? Because (a) you'll burn all the calories you consume, (b) you deserve it, and (c) you'll be injured soon and back on a restricted diet anyway."
Don Kardong
Funny Yoga Quotes
“I only go to yoga to drink wine, so I’m good. I just throw the calories right back in.” – Kaley Cuoco
Sports Pick Up Lines
I know a fun activity that can burn 500 calories an hour...
Twinkle Twinkle Funny Poems
Twinkle twinkle little pie,
You squash my willpower like a fly.
You look so innocent and so sweet,
Convince my lips that we should meet.
You are a relentless flirt,
Oh no, we had indecent dessert.

Twinkle twinkle help appears,
A Stevia leaf erased my fears.
It made my willpower a superhero,
As for calories it has zero.
Twinkle twinkle Truvia™ star,
It has natural sweetness I love just what you are.
(Michael Hack)
Toaster Puns
Just burned 2,000 calories.
That’s the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.
Corny Jokes
Me: I just burned 2000 calories in 20 minutes.
Friend: How?
Me: I forgot to take my brownies out of the oven.
Food Quotes
“Another day, another 13,000 calories.”
— Andy Lassner