Do you have a date for Valentine’s Day?
Yes, it is February 14th
Why shouldn't you kiss anyone on January 1st?
Because it's only the first date
You are in my heart, my mind, and in my entire body.
In fact, my doctor says that you must be a parasite!
A toast to you:
You always know how to make everything butter.
What do you say when you find the perfect font?
You’re just my type!
My son fell asleep last night with the TV clicker in his hand.
He’s really embraced remote learning.
The cat’s out of the bag – I love you purry much.
I have bean thinking about you.
You will always have
a pizza of my heart.
I have bean
thinking about you.
"Yoda one for me."
I told my wife to embrace her mistakes
So she gave me a hug!!!
Do you ever wake up, kiss the person beside you and feel glad you are alive?
I just did and apparently I will not be allowed on this airline again!
How do you get a teddy bear across the border?
You snuggle it across.
What do you call someone that's hungry for some cuddles?
Hugry.
I get a real kick out of you.
Why is it so hard for people with asthma to have exciting dates?
The last thing you want is someone to take your breath away!
If you were a triangle, you’d be acute one.
What is a dairy product like as a partner?
They’re your butter half.
I love spending koala-ty time with you.
I love you berry much.
You’re udder-ly perfect.
Or maybe it’s baseball players because they’re so great at hitting it off.
You must be copper and terillium because you are Cu-Te
What did the lipstick say after he let down his friend?
I’ll make it up to you.
"Did you hear how the baker proposed to his girlfriend?"
"Yeah, he told her he loafed her more than life itself"
"No, he actually told her how much he kneaded her"
My counselor gave me a hug today
I guess I got shrinkwrapped
Why do accountants make good lovers?
They're great with figures.
Their romance started by candlelight.
But it only lasted a wick.
What’s green and mean and stabs you when you hug it?
Cactus
If you get married out on sea or in a boat...
is that a row-mance?
Why did Larry the lizard leave his lover longing?
he had ... a reptile dysfunction
I like you sow much.
What do you get if your lovers soul was trapped in a sword for all eternity?
A babe-blade.
What is the cutest car?
A BM-cuddle-U
Being in love is a lot like central heating in your home.
You turn it on just before your guests come over and pretend that your house is always like this.
Why do painters always fall for their models?
Because they love them with all of their art.
I love you from my head tomatoes.
What sound do hedgehogs make when they kiss?
Ouch
What did the salad lover say to his girlfriend?
You will Romaine in my heart forever ?
I scored when I met you.
My wife and were on the sofa and I lean in for a cuddle.
She says: "careful I'm holding a tea!"
And I say: "and I'm holding you, so I guess we're both holding letters of the alphabet"
Why is it always easy for vampires to find their better halves?
Because it’s always love at first bite.
You octopi my thoughts.
"I lava you."
I’m o-fish-ally in love with you.
My gay lover asked me if date night was optional.
I said no, it's a mandate
If you really want to get a date at a restaurant, it’s always nice to cut to the cheese.
Let’s commit the perfect crime together.
I’ll steal your heart and you can steal mine.
I feel thankful for having you as my gym buddy and lover.
Our relationship is really working out.