Being uncomfortable with any physical contact, I decided to rent the book “How to Hug” from the library.
Turns out it was Volume 6 of an old encyclopedia.
You are just like my car because you drive me crazy.
If you get married out on sea or in a boat...
is that a row-mance?
Wow, wouldn’t mind if you became my significant otter.
You will always have
a pizza of my heart.
-
One thing you never want to do is divorce a butcher.
That would be a huge missed steak.
What do you get if your lovers soul was trapped in a sword for all eternity?
A babe-blade.
Owl always love you.
There were two antennas who met on a roof and they fell in love and decided to get married. The ceremony was nothing fancy, but you could tell that they had a very strong connection.
How do you kiss someone at the end of the world?
On the apoca-lips.
How do you get a teddy bear across the border?
You snuggle it across.
I cannot espresso
how much you mean to me.
I loaf you a lot.
Let’s go to bread.
What is the cutest car?
A BM-cuddle-U
What did the salad lover say to his girlfriend?
You will Romaine in my heart forever ?
What do you get when you kiss a diseased bird?
Cherpies, but don't worry.
It's tweetable.
"I wood never leaf you."
I whale-y like you.
What did the lipstick say after he let down his friend?
I’ll make it up to you.
I feel thankful for having you as my gym buddy and lover.
Our relationship is really working out.
What shape is a kiss?
A-lip-tickle.
There might be other fish in the sea, but you’re my sole mate
"Aloe you vera much."
Why is it always easy for vampires to find their better halves?
Because it’s always love at first bite.
Your love will always be up to par.
Why is it so hard for people with asthma to have exciting dates?
The last thing you want is someone to take your breath away!
From one vegan to another – I think you’re fern-tastic, and I’ll never leaf you baby.
You’re my #1 pick.
I love spending koala-ty time with you.
I always have a ball with you.
My counselor gave me a hug today
I guess I got shrinkwrapped
Whenever two vegetarians fall in love, you know that’s going to be a great pear. Now lettuce celebrate, because we all love vegetables.
What did the bowl of soup write on their Valentine?
I love you pho real.
I’m soy
into you.