If you were a triangle, you’d be acute one.
I like to crouch down, hug my knees and lean forward.
That's just how I roll
I cannoli be happy
What’s green and mean and stabs you when you hug it?
Cactus
What did the salad lover say to his girlfriend?
You will Romaine in my heart forever ?
I cannot espresso
how much you mean to me.
Why should you never break up with a goalie?
Because he is a keeper!
Why is it so hard for people with asthma to have exciting dates?
The last thing you want is someone to take your breath away!
"I wood never leaf you."
You’re udder-ly perfect.
How long have I loved you? I’ve lost track.
What did the fruit lover say after he met a girl?
I’ve got a date
You must be copper and terillium because you are Cu-Te
What did the lipstick say after he let down his friend?
I’ll make it up to you.
What did the koala say to his girlfriend?
I love you-calpytus.
What’s it like to kiss a vampire?
A real pain in the neck!
What did one slice of bread say to the other at their wedding?
Let’s grow mold together.
You are like my asthma.
You just take my breath away.
My counselor gave me a hug today
I guess I got shrinkwrapped
What do German meat lovers breathe?
Hamburg-air
I think you’re incredi-bowl.
I used to love puns about throwing things, but now I don’t.
It was just a fling.
You’re right up my alley.
I loaf you a lot.
Let’s go to bread.
Sloths never kiss on the first date, they take it slow.
Why did the skeleton need a hug?
Because he had nobody.
I have bean thinking about you.
Why do accountants make good lovers?
They're great with figures.
What did one sushi roll say to the other sushi roll?
I’m soy into you.
I feel thankful for having you as my gym buddy and lover.
Our relationship is really working out.
Do you have a date for Valentine’s Day?
Yes, it is February 14th
My gay lover asked me if date night was optional.
I said no, it's a mandate
Whenever two vegetarians fall in love, you know that’s going to be a great pear. Now lettuce celebrate, because we all love vegetables.
I'm reading a romance book in Braille.
I don't think I'll finish. It's too touchy feely for me.