I'm reading a romance book in Braille.
I don't think I'll finish. It's too touchy feely for me.
What did one slice of bread say to the other at their wedding?
Let’s grow mold together.
What is it called when two spies hug?
A bond-ing moment.
I told my wife to embrace her mistakes
So she gave me a hug!!!
I whale always love you.
I cannoli be happy
You octopi my thoughts.
How do flowers kiss?
With their tulips
Your love is like vodka.
You were worth the chase.
Sorry if this is extra cheesy, but you have a pizza my heart.
Being in love is a lot like central heating in your home.
You turn it on just before your guests come over and pretend that your house is always like this.
I scored when I met you.
I love all my computer brands and sometimes give ’em smooches.
But I never kiss Intel.
I love you berry much.
I whale-y like you.
Their romance started by candlelight.
But it only lasted a wick.
What did the grilled cheese say to the frying pan?
You make me melt.
Wow, wouldn’t mind if you became my significant otter.
Why should you never break up with a goalie?
Because he is a keeper!
Are you a beaver? ‘Cause dam.
-
One thing you never want to do is divorce a butcher.
That would be a huge missed steak.
When girls say they want a guy who can sweep them off their feet...
they do know that there’s a janitor ready for the job, right?
"I wood never leaf you."
My counselor gave me a hug today
I guess I got shrinkwrapped
I have bean thinking about you.
What do you call someone that's hungry for some cuddles?
Hugry.
You know, I didn't kiss my wife until I was married...
because she wasn't my wife until we were married.
What’s it like to kiss a vampire?
A real pain in the neck!
I’m no geometric genius, but all love triangles soon turn into wreck-tangles.
Whenever two vegetarians fall in love, you know that’s going to be a great pear. Now lettuce celebrate, because we all love vegetables.
Some bunny loves you.
I’m o-fish-ally in love with you.
Owl always love you.
What did the salad lover say to his girlfriend?
You will Romaine in my heart forever ?
What do you get when you kiss a diseased bird?
Cherpies, but don't worry.
It's tweetable.
Do you ever wake up, kiss the person beside you and feel glad you are alive?
I just did and apparently I will not be allowed on this airline again!
You’re udder-ly perfect.
I’ll always be running-back to you.
Being uncomfortable with any physical contact, I decided to rent the book “How to Hug” from the library.
Turns out it was Volume 6 of an old encyclopedia.
You’re my #1 pick.
What’s green and mean and stabs you when you hug it?
Cactus
My little girl just asked for a goodnight kiss on her nose....
I said I can't kiss that thing it smells!
What's the deal with people who refuse to embrace technology?
Answers on a postcard please.
I always find artists romantic because when they love you, they do it with all their art.
The cat’s out of the bag – I love you purry much.
Sloths never kiss on the first date, they take it slow.
I loaf you a lot.
Let’s go to bread.
How do you get a teddy bear across the border?
You snuggle it across.
What shape is a kiss?
A-lip-tickle.
I cannot espresso
how much you mean to me.