Knock knock. Who's there? You're - You're who? - You're single!
We need to cover more ground so we should split up.
Raise your hand if you have a boyfriend.
Not so fast
What did the weather reporter say to his wife?
“I hope it doesn’t rain, deer!”
You remind me of Halley's Comet. I don't wanna see you again for another 74 years.
Are you a parking ticket? Because you're evidence that I made a mistake.
Are you a dollar bill? Because you’re single.
Are you a fidget spinner? Because the last time I had fun with you was forever ago and I’m not really interested in touching you anymore. I’m pretty sure you were just a phase and now I’d really like to get you out of my house and forget it ever happened.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
You made my life a mess
Please call a clean-up crew
Hey baby, are you in a tunnel? Because we’re breaking up.
Girl, If you were a fruit you'd be a can't-elope.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
My divorce attorney
I really like you. So does my wife.
Girl you're looking like a snack and I'm going on a diet.
Whoa, Heaven must be missing an angel! Because you’re dead to me.
Me: Did it hurt?
Her: Did what hurt?
Me: When the door hit you in the ass on the way out.
I expected some baggage with our relationship but I didn’t expect the cargo of the Titanic to come floating to the surface.
Are you a New Years resolution? Because we stopped working out after the first two weeks
Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.
They say one man's trash is another man's treasure. I hope you find someone who treasures you.
Are you an astronaut? Because I need some space.
I see my future like how the Americans spell colour. Without u.
This relationship is kinda like the Superbowl LIII halftime show; I can’t wait for it to be over.
We must be a cast on a spiral fracture, girl. Because we’re on a serious break.
Hey baby, you know what sounds good? You and me never speaking to each other again.
Let’s make like a banana and split.
Sorry sweety, but I think I'm in love with your mom.
Hey babe, are you the Mcdonald's Ice Cream Machine, because you just aren't working for me anymore.
Remember when I asked you out? Well, I was talking to the girl behind you.
Hey babe, how about I plan a romantic weekend get away, and while I’m gone you can pack your shit and GTFO?
Damn girl, are you a magician’s assistant? Because I want you to disappear from my life.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put I at the beginning and U at the end.
Roses are red, violets are blue, trash is dumped and so are you.
Wanna see a magic trick? Abrakadabra, you're single now.
The Best Break Up Lines
Want to know a joke? Our relationship.
Do you happen to know sign language? Because this is the last time you’ll hear from me.
I think it would be hot if we f**ked other people. Exclusively.
You looked better when I was drunk.
Honey if I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put the letters "DON'T LOVE" in between I and U
It’s not you – it’s me. I don’t like you anymore.
Are you a fire alarm? because you are really freaking loud and annoying
Dang girl, are you an angel? Because you are dead to me.
Hey girl, you must be a math book because you’re full of problems.
Can we still share a netflix account?
I think we need to become better strangers.
Hey baby, I think I'm going blind. Because I can't see you anymore.
We should make like your parents and split.
Did we fall from the sky? Because we look pretty broken up right now.
There's something I've been wanting to say since the day we met. Goodbye.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd rather be dead than continue seeing you!