What do doctors do to injured elements? They helium.
How rich is Avogadro?
He's a multi-mole-ionaire.
What kind of bears dissolve in water?
Polar bears.
What illness kept Avogadro in bed for two months?
Mole-onucleosis
You know what's cool about chemistry?
Endothermic reactions.
Oxygen went on a date with potassium last night.
It went OK.
Why couldn't the alpha helix say the alphabet?
Because it broke up every time it got to L-amino P.
I am out of chemistry jokes. I should zinc of a new one.
How would you describe a stinky chemist?
Mole-odorous
Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
Funny chemistry puns always get a good reaction.
What do you call an acid with attitude?
A meano-acid.
What kind of fruit did Avogadro eat in the summer?
Water-mole-ns
Organic chemistry is really hard.
Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.
I'm fascinated by water's gas form.
It mist-ifies me.
When life gives you mold - make penicillin.
What did the generous mole say when people crashed his party?
The mole the merrier
How do you make a hormone? You don't pay her.
A chemistry lab is like a big party.
Some drop the acid while others drop the base.
If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice? H2O cubed.
Who brings colorful eggs to chemist's kids every spring?
The Ether Bunny.
Why did the military use acid?
To neutralize the enemy base.
Wanna hear a pun about gold? AU!
What did Avogadro teach his students in math class?
Mole-tiplication
It's getting hard to zinc of new science puns because so many of them argon.
An electrolyte and a solvent are talking in jail.
Solvent: What are you in for?
Electrolyte: A salt charge.
If Iron Man and the Silver Surfer teamed up together, would they be alloys?
I can eat sugar with either hand, I'm ambidextrose.
What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
"HeHe."
When hydrogen got arrested they told him he had one phone call.
He replied: "Call who? I don't have a family!"
I like looking at a chart of all the chemical elements... periodically.
Ah! The element of surprise.