There's something I've been wanting to say since the day we met. Goodbye.
The mothership has returned and I must leave.
Can we still share a netflix account?
Sorry sweety, but I think I'm in love with your mom.
I really like you. So does my wife.
Remember when I asked you out? Well, I was talking to the girl behind you.
Knock knock. Who's there? You're - You're who? - You're single!
You looked better when I was drunk.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd rather be dead than continue seeing you!
The Best Break Up Lines
Want to know a joke? Our relationship.
It's not you...it's your taste in music.
Do you believe in love at first sight? How about misery after three years?
I just can't take the bad s*x anymore.
Is it hot in here or is this relationship suffocating me?
I think we need to become better strangers.
You look like my future ex wife.
Hey baby, remember how you said that you can’t live without me? Well, it’s time to get your affairs in order….
We must be a cast on a spiral fracture, girl. Because we’re on a serious break.
Do you happen to know sign language? Because this is the last time you’ll hear from me.
We should make like your parents and split.
Hey baby, you know what sounds good? You and me never speaking to each other again.
Hey, remember back when we were a thing… Yeah… Good times.
It’s a good thing we’re bad at puzzles because there is no way we’re putting this shit back together.
Whoa, Heaven must be missing an angel! Because you’re dead to me.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put I at the beginning and U at the end.
Let’s make like a banana and split.
Are you the dog? Because your shit’s all over the lawn.
Here, look at this blank piece of paper for a second… I wrote every reason why we should stick together on it.
I expected some baggage with our relationship but I didn’t expect the cargo of the Titanic to come floating to the surface.
Are you a stop watch? Because our time is up.
Are you a fire alarm? because you are really freaking loud and annoying
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
Let’s make like an atom, and split.
It’s not you – it’s me. I don’t like you anymore.
Girl, have we both been rendered sightless? Because we ain’t seeing each other anymore.
Hey babe, how about I plan a romantic weekend get away, and while I’m gone you can pack your shit and GTFO?
Hey girl, you must be a math book because you’re full of problems.
Excuse me, I seem to have lost my phone number, can you do the same?
I see my future like how the Americans spell colour. Without u.
What’s your sign? Mine is stop.
Dinosaurs represent our relationship, because they both don’t exist anymore.”
Are you a thief? Because you stole a year of my life.
Are you a fidget spinner? Because the last time I had fun with you was forever ago and I’m not really interested in touching you anymore. I’m pretty sure you were just a phase and now I’d really like to get you out of my house and forget it ever happened.
Hey baby are you American cheese because you come as a single now.
I don’t know what I’d do without you, but starting tomorrow I’m going to give it a try.
Are you an astronaut? Because I need some space.
What’s the difference between me and your socks? I’m not yours anymore.
I’d better get a library card, because I’m checking out of this relationship.
This relationship is kinda like the Superbowl LIII halftime show; I can’t wait for it to be over.
You’re the girl that everybody wants. Today is their lucky day.