Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd rather be dead than continue seeing you!
Honey if I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put the letters "DON'T LOVE" in between I and U
Hey baby are you American cheese because you come as a single now.
"I now pronounce you dumped and single. You may now kiss my ass."
Roses are red
Violets are blue
You made my life a mess
Please call a clean-up crew
Hey, did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because honestly, Karen, you are a demon.
Hey babe do you need crutches? Cause I can’t stand you anymore.
Hey, remember back when we were a thing… Yeah… Good times.
Wanna see a magic trick? Abrakadabra, you're single now.
"I took a gamble and chose you, now i believe I made a bad bet."
Hey Pumpkin, I just wanted to say that I'm done with having Halloween every day.
"Really, our time together has just become more effort than you're worth."
"The longer we are together, the less serious I am about you."
Hey girl, you must be a math book because you’re full of problems.
Baby are you an angel? Because I'm a atheist.
We should make like your parents and split.
Are you a thief? Because you stole a year of my life.
Dinosaurs represent our relationship, because they both don’t exist anymore.”
Did we fall from the sky? Because we look pretty broken up right now.
Girl: Want to see a magic trick?
Boyfriend: Sure.
Girl: Poof you're single.
I expected some baggage with our relationship but I didn’t expect the cargo of the Titanic to come floating to the surface.
Roses are red, violets are blue, trash is dumped and so are you.
Are you the dog? Because your shit’s all over the lawn.
I don’t know what I’d do without you, but starting tomorrow I’m going to give it a try.
"This isn't easy and neither are you. I'm breaking up with you."
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
"There's something I've been wanting to say since the day we met - goodbye."
If you take the "L" out of LOVER. Its OVER.
"Our relationship is like a fat guy."
"What?"
"It's not working out."
Hear that sound? (cup hand to ear) Yep- that's a dump truck, and it's coming for you!
"I just can't live with the pathetic tickles that you call thrusts anymore."
"Roses are red, Violets are blue. Garbage is dumped, now so are you."
Aside from being single, what do you do for a living?
Damn girl, are you a magician’s assistant? Because I want you to disappear from my life.
"Is it hot in here or is this relationship suffocating me?"
Hey babe, how about I plan a romantic weekend get away, and while I’m gone you can pack your shit and GTFO?
Roses are red
And you gotta go
Because I found out
That you is a ho.
Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.
Do you believe in love at first sight? How about misery after three years?
Can we still share a netflix account?
Hey, babe. I think it's time we take our relationship to the previous level.
Hey baby, you know what sounds good? You and me never speaking to each other again.
Do those legs go all the way? Because you should use them to go away.
"We are like a broken mirror. It is better to leave it broken than hurt yourself to fix it."
I think it would be hot if we f**ked other people. Exclusively.
What did the weather reporter say to his wife?
“I hope it doesn’t rain, deer!”
I just can't take the bad s*x anymore.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
But I don't care
Cause I'm leaving you.
"If it's meant to be it's meant to be....but just to be clear it isn't."
We should make like the Soviet Union and split up.