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Female Jokes

Puns
The female janitor at my office asked me if I would like to smoke some weed with her.
I said no. I can't deal with high maintenance women.
Deer Puns
What did Homer Simpson say when he saw a female deer?
“Doe!”
What did the outraged female deer say to the mule?
How deer you!
France Puns
What is a female "Douchebag" in France called??
A douche-baguette.
Tiger Puns
How do you know if a tiger is male or female?
Throw a rock at it. If he runs it's a male. If she runs it's a female.
April Fools Jokes
What do you call a female clown?
April Fools.
I Want...
A drunk falls into a cab, gives the cabbie a $20 bill and bellows "I wanna get screwed." The cabbie dutifully drives him to the 'burbs and points out a town house. The drunk staggers up to the front door, bangs on it, and screams "I wanna get screwed!" A female voice answers, "Slip $100 under the door." The drunk pushes $100 under the door. Nothing happens. After a while the drunk bangs on the door again and screams "I wanna get screwed!" The female voice answers, "What? Again!?"
Utensils Puns
Why did the female chef win the cook-off?
Because cheese grater!
Radio Puns
What do you do to a female news anchor who breaks a leg?
You put her in a broadcast.
Crocodile Puns
A French photographer and his friend from Czechoslovakia were visiting Australia.
Unfortunately, one day they got too close to a nesting site and were attacked and eaten by a pair of crocodiles.
The female ate the Frenchman.
The Czech was in the male.
How about the stylish female crocodile, she's every inch a frock-o-dile.
Mushroom Puns
Why is it impossible to have a balanced conversation with a female mushroom? - Because shiitake too much!
Mall Pick Up Lines
Hey I need a female opinion - what do you think would look better on me, this or this?
Dad Jokes
How to determine the gender of your cat?
pour some milk in a bowl and place it next to the cat, if she drinks it, your cat is a female, but if he drinks it, the cat is a male
Flight Puns
I just flew on a plane with an all female flight crew.
It was an....unmanned aircraft.
Ancient Rome Puns
Did you hear about the new Netflix series? The one about a couple of poor female artists living in 1600s Rome?
I think it's called Two Baroque Girls