Where do sharks go when they want a vacation? Finland
The pilot was lucky. He always had work. Whenever he made an application, it was almost certain that he would land a job.
I was arrested at the airport. Just because I was greeting my cousin Jack!
All that I said was "Hi Jack", but very loud.
The best place to hide something is at an airport
You'd be hiding something in plane site.
I had an instant connection with someone in South Korea. I think they're my Seoul mate.
Long ago, a couple of dudes claimed that human flight was possible.
They were Wright.
I was waiting at the airport baggage carousel, and noticed that everyone else had a better bag than me.
It was ....the worst case scenario.
What does Father Christmas do for his summer holidays? Santa Cruz.
As you would expect, most airline pilots make friends only in high places.
What do we call an airplane that cannot take off? It is called an error plane.
What did the beach say to the water? "I need some vitamin sea."
My son asked me how often planes crash
Usually just once
A photon turns up at check-in for a flight with no baggage. The check-in agent says "Traveling light?". He says "Yes, I am".
I was so tired. I needed a sea-esta on the beach.
I used to be addicted to time travel,
but that's all in the past now.
Did you hear about the vultures who went to check-in for their flight at the airport? When the check-in agent asked them if they had any luggage to check, they replied, no we just have carri-on.
Los Angeles International Airport should sell their own brand of laxatives called LAXatives.
Prague is my number one choice for a dream destination...
Dying to Czech it out
Pilots would be very hard to beat in a competition, they are always ready for a-rrival.
You never realize how time flies when you are not wearing a watch on a plane.
I've got this awful disease where I can't stop telling airport puns.
I think it may be terminal
I would tell a time travel joke,
but you didn't like it.
My dad used to be an airline pilot, but he decided to retire because it got too Boe-ing.
My dad thought Cuba would be boring. He's now Havana a really great time.
Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
I have always had acrophobia, but the plane flight brought it to a new height.
I never get tide down to one place when there's so much to sea.
No one can accuse this trip of being plane.
On a recent flight, my friend asked me, "If the door suddenly opens, you think we will fall out?
I said, "No, we will still be friends."
A ship wanted to travel from the Pacific to the Arctic
But it just couldn't get its Bering Strait.
My grandad was responsible for 28 downed german planes in WW2.
Still to this day, he holds the record as the worst mechanic the Luftwaffe ever had.
I am lucky to live in an airport, but whenever the guard comes out at night, Heathrows me out.
Windmills? I’m a huge fan!
I think there'll be a ferry-tale ending to this trip.
If a baby is born on a plane, i guess you could call it... airborn.
This palace is a breath of fresh heir!
Took a flight, and my luggage got torn to pieces....
My lawyer said I don't have much of a case.
Koi fish always travel in a groups of four
Because the predator will go after the D koi
Cows that travel alone?
Never herd of them!
What kind of chocolate do they sell at the airport?
Plane chocolate
Will invisible airplanes ever be a thing?
I just can't see them taking off.
Why did the volcano say to the mountain? I lava you
If you travel to the future and get decapitated
You'd be ahead of your time
As soon as the plane was invented, things started looking up.
Why do the propellers of a plane go around and around?
To keep the pilot cool because if they stopped, man would he sweat
When you cross a plane and a snake, you will end up with a Boeing Constrictor.
I drank alot of alcohol at the airport last night.
I now have a terminal hangover.
If you are going to sleep, I wish you suite dreams.
The company is planning to make a new series to show people how to fly an aeroplane. They are now filming the pilot.
A security guard at an airport informs the pilot of a man trying to sneak contraband onto an airplane.
The pilot responds, "That's not going to fly."