I thought I broke my leg when I tripped over a box of Kleenex last night
But the doctor said it's only tissue damage.
What do you call a disabled paper towel?
A napkan't.
Why didn't the toilet paper finish the race?
Because it was wiped out.
Why do toilet paper rolls have trust issues?
They're always getting ripped off.
"Have you seen our toilet roll?" asked my wife.
"Don't be silly," I replied.
"A toilet is a stationary object."
What do you call the second tissue paper?
Kleenext.
Having to wipe with a hemorrhoid is a pain in the a**.