What did the flirty napking say to the dinner guests?
"Let me sit on your lap"
I dislike toilet paper because...
They're tearable.
I made a bridge out of Kleenex.
I have truss tissues.
Ran out of toilet paper today. We’re now using lettuce leaves.
Today was just the tip of the iceberg. Tomorrow romaines to be seen.
This flu season, doctors are recommending you wipe your throat down with tissues.
Apparently they're synonymous with clean necks.
"Have you seen our toilet roll?" asked my wife.
"Don't be silly," I replied.
"A toilet is a stationary object."
How do you work out how many rolls of toilet paper are in 4 packets of 16?
Multiply.