Why do thespians have great hair? They want the perfect part.
Why did the Lord of the Rings author get kicked out of the movie theatre.
He was Tolkien all the way through.
The stage is the most hygienic place in the world. Every time we turn on the lights they get a wash.
Opening a new shadow puppet theatre. Business plan says we'll make a fortune, but those are just projected figures.
I gave someone directions to a theater today
I guess I am a movie director now.
What did the thief steal on the theatre's opening night? The spotlight.
Why the skeleton doesn't go to the theater?
Because he has nobody to go with.
Never date a Theater person...
... wayyy too much Drama...
I'm coming out of the closet to tell everyone I was just hired as a seamstress for the theatre.
Why did the penguin enter the theatre?
He wanted to go into snow business
Friend of mine got sacked as a set designer for not producing anything. He didn't make a scene.
Show your popcorn and coke guy at the movies a little appreciation. After all, he makes a lot of concessions.
An actor I know fell through the floor recently. It's just a stage he was going through.
The skeleton would love to see the latest horror flick, but he just doesn't have the guts for it.
An actor arrived for his rehearsal at the theatre.
As he looked around, an incredible feeling of deja vu swept over him.
Suddenly he realised the set seemed like a weird adaption of his apartment, the actress looked like an odd version of his wife, and the director sounded like an eerie rendition of his dad.
"Uncanny!" He thought. "I've arrived at a strange stage of my life".
My buddy was cast in Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs, but he was still angry because he wasn't Happy.
I went to a theater performance done on a bunch of dictionaries the other day...
It was a play on words.
This hottie has forever changed the film industry, and it starts with the letter P and ends with 'orn'. Reel your mind back in - we're talking popcorn!
We should've guessed the failed postman wouldn't be any better at delivering his acting lines.
I tried to come up with a funny theatre joke, but it was all just an act.
Couple of friends have decided to put theatre style seats in their house. It will end in tiers.
My friend told me he had to leave the play after Act l. Knowing he'd waited forever to see it, I asked him why. He said the program stated that Act ll was two years later, and he refused to wait that long.
Don't theater jokes always seem so staged?
My grandfather warned people that the Titanic would sink
*No one listened, but he kept on warning them nonetheless until they got sick of him and kicked him out of the movie theatre*
I wonder why theatres are so sad? They're always dark, moody, and in tiers.
If you don't focus on learning your lines for the production, I shutter to imagine what the reviewers will snap about.
I just got fired from my theatre job. I guess I should've made a bigger scene about it.
You know why theater people say "break a leg" instead of good luck?
Because if you do, you'll end up in a cast!
My dad always said the secret to theatre was to always leave them wanting more.
He was a great guy but a terrible anaesthetist.
It may just be a stage I'm going through, but I sure do love the trapdoors on set.
I seem to find a way of sneaking chocolate into movie theaters..
.. I always have a few twix up my sleeve.