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One eye Jokes

Funny Poems
I've fallen in love- I don't know why
I've fallen in love with a girl with one eye.

I knew from the start. It was plain to see
That this wonderful girl had an eye out for me

She's charming and witty and jolly and jocular
Not what you'd expect from a girl who's monocular.

Of eyes - at the moment - she hasn't full quota
But that doesn't change things for me one iota.

It must be quite difficult if you're bereft.
If your left eye is gone and your right eye is left.

But she's made up her mind. She's made her decision.
She can see it quite clearly in 10/20 vision.

She'll not leave me waiting, not left in the lurch
If she looks slightly sideways she'll see me in church.

I'll marry my true love who's gentle and kind.
And thus prove to everyone that loves not quite blind.

(By Andrew Jefferson)
Eye Puns
Did you know there is a new horse species with one eye and a horn?
It's called a unicornea.
I've been trying to sleep with one eye open lately, but it's really hard
Last night I couldn't sleep a wink
One Liners and Short Jokes
Why do army snipers close one eye while shooting?
Because if they closed both eyes they wouldn't be able to see.
Dinosaur Puns
What do your call a dinosaur with one eye? Eye-saur.
What do you call a dinosaur with one eye? Doyouthinkhesawus
What do you call a dinosaur with one eye?
A do-you-think-he-saur-us.
Ski Puns
What is a cyclops' favorite winter activity?
Sking. That's like skiing, but only with one eye.
Blond Jokes
Two blondes are walking down the road when one says "Look at that dog with one eye!"
The other blonde covers one of her eyes and says "Where?"