One evening I wrote to John and I guess I was expressing my frustrations with not having enough time as I had a briefcase full of work to do that evening. Jaymac, in his wisdom, sent me back the following funny but inspirational poem:

Briefcase with an Engine
Poet: John McLeod

Fit your briefcase with an engine
Go skateboarding in the sun
Loop the loop, do aerobatics,
Laugh a lot and have great fun!

'Cook a snook' at paper empires
Save a forest, every tree
And remember, above all,
To do it happily!

It reminded me life is too short to let work frustrate me. Reading John's words of wisdom helped relieve my stress as I found myself smiling when I finished reading the poem. And, smiling and laughing is a great stress reliever!

Many times during my career I let my work control my life. Looking back at the times where I allowed my work to create stress and frustration in my life I now realize what I thought was important really was not. I am not say

Are you an alarm clock? Because I want to kill you.

When do you serve tofu turkey? Pranksgiving

A woman turns to her husband on their silver wedding anniversary and says, ‘Darling, will you still love me when my hair turns grey?’
Her husband replies, ‘Why not?
I stuck with you through the other six shades.’

Did you hear about the man who used to be addicted to eating raw meat? Don't worry, he's cured now!

Steal a man's wallet and he'll be poor for a day.
But teach him to play an instrument and he'll be poor for the rest of his life.

What are male twins inside a pregnant woman called?
Em-bro-yos.

“I meditate and do yoga. I sit cross-legged and try not to levitate too much.” – Jeremy Brett

3 animals enter a bar. A lion, a tiger and a bear.
Oh my!

Q: Patient: Doctor, sometimes I feel like I'm invisible.
A: Doctor: Who said that?

What do ghosts use to keep their hair in place? Scare-spray!

What do you call a dinosaur who is elected to Congress? Rep. Tile!

“Hello, Monday! May I ask you a question? Why are you always back so quickly? Don’t you have a hobby?”

Why couldn’t the witch have children? Her husband had a hallow weenie.

Patient: Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake." Doctor: Next time, take off the candles.

What do you see at a funeral for a piece of fruit? Apple-bearer.

"We pay our gym membership for the permission to exercise in the gym, not for the owner(s) of the gym to exercise for us."

- Mokokoma Mokhonoana.

What did the electrical engineer say when he got shocked? That hertz.

Q: Why does the cherry have a hard time getting along with others?
A: It has crust issues.

We were mermaid for each other.

Who put the Howl in Halloween?
Not ghouls just the people they ate!

Do you get a hint of almond in this Keemun? No? That’s odd because I’m nuts about you.

What did one nut say to the other?
“Cashew later.”

Softball is just like baseball
Except the tactics seem more underhanded.

"There are good ships
and wood ships
and ships that sail the sea.
But the best ships
are friendships
and may they always be."

Why are houseflies great at arithmetics? Because they multiply really fast.

From a frog: Hey baby, it's a future rose from a future prince.

What did the gardeners say when he discovered nasty weeds in his garden?
I have spotted spurge!

Whats the worst thing about manufacturing tabletops?
It's counterproductive.

Who is a polar bear’s favorite musician?
Seal.

Two monkeys are high up in the tree.
One turns to the other and says, “Oooo ooo aah aahh!!”
The second monkey says, “Well put some cold water on it then!"

My realtor sold me a two-story house.
One story before the offer, another story after the offer.

Why shouldn’t you iron a four-leaved clover?
You don’t want to press your luck.

Why do poets always write about the sea?
They just can’t fathom her depths.

Are you sure that you’re not a microwave oven? Because, you sure make my heart melt!

What types of songs do planets sing?
Nep-tunes.

How about we get down to monkey business?

What do ponies look for in a vehicle?
Lots of horsepower.

What's the difference between trumpet players and government bonds? Government bonds eventually mature and earn money.

Never has there been a more romantic story than how those two geologists met.
It was lava at first sight.

What is a pianist’s favorite cheese ?
Mozzartrella.

How do you shoot a three-headed ghoul?
Bang! Bang! Bang!

Why couldn't the cowboy get down from his horse?
Because you can only get down from a goose.

I seem to have run out of tea...
What a catastrotea.

What is the similarity between my wallet and an onion? Whenever I open both of them, I cry.

Are you cold? You look like you could use some hot chocolate… Well, here I am!

Your sweater must be made out of wife material.

I put some bread in the toaster this morning, but it never popped up again
I think it might be comatoast.

I recently broke up with my caterpillar girlfriend.
She'd changed.

Knock, knock
Who’s there?
Ben.
Ben who?
Ben knocking For 10 minutes.