What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room? Odor in the court. What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? Dam!
What do you call a laughing motorcycle? A Yamahahaha
Who goes to the bathroom in the middle of a party? A party pooper.
What the difference between you and a calendar? a calendar has dates.
What do you get when you plant kisses? Tu-lips (two-lips)
Did you hear about the paper boy? He blew away
Why did Harry Potter throw away all his old potions?
They were past their hexpiration date!
What kind of lights did Noah use on the Ark? Flood lights!
Why is it so windy inside a stadium?
There are hundreds of fans.
What do you get if you a cross a card game with a typhoon? Bridge over troubled water.
Why are some fish at the bottom of the ocean? Because they dropped out of school!
A bunch of vampire hunters needed to talk
So they scheduled a stakeholders meeting.
Why did God make only one Yogi Bear? Because when he tried to make a second one he made a Boo-Boo.
Q: What did the dentist get for an award?
A: A little plaque
What did one aspiring wig say to the other aspiring wig? I wanna get a head!
What did the M&M go to college? Because he wanted to be a Smarty.
Did you hear the joke about the germ? Never mind. I don't want to spread it around
Why are frogs so happy? They eat whatever bugs them
What did the stamp say to the envelope? Stick with me and we will go places!
What did the leopard say after eating his owner? Man, that hit the "spot."
What did the tie say to the hat? A. You go on ahead and I'll hang around
What belongs to you but others use more? Your name
Why did the banana go to the Doctor? Because it was not peeling well
What did the zero say to the eight?
Nice belt!
Why did the soccer player bring string to the game? So he could tie the score.
What did the alien say to the garden? Take me to your weeder.
What did the painter say to the wall? One more crack like that and I'll plaster you!
Knock, knock
Who’s There?
Annie
Annie Who?
Annie thing you can do, I can do better.
What kind of bed does a mermaid sleep in? A water
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers.
What did one elevator say to the other elevator? I think I'm coming down with something!
What is brown and has a head and a tail but no legs? A penny.
How did the farmer mend his pants? With cabbage patches!
What do you get when you cross Sonic The Hedgehog and Curious George? 2 Fast 2 Curious
Why did the two 4's skip lunch? They already 8 (ate).
Learning how to collect trash wasn’t hard.
I just picked it up as I went along.
Did you hear about the vampire bicycle that went round biting people's arms off? It was a vicious cycle.
Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato? The lettuce was a "head" and the tomato was trying to "ketchup"!
What runs but can't walk? The faucet!
What has one horn and gives milk? A milk truck.
What do you call a group of men waiting for a haircut? A barbercue
What exam do young witches have to pass? A spell-ing test!
Why did the belt get arrested? He held up a pair of pants.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
What kind of shorts do clouds wear? Thunderwear
What do you call an illegally parked frog? Toad.
Did you hear about the blonde who gave her cat a bath? She still hasn't gotten all the hair off her tongue.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He felt crummy!
What does a nosey pepper do? Gets jalapeno business!
What do you call a horse that can't lose a race? Sherbet