Last evening I walked up the hill in the park to see the planets. Stumbled over a lip in the concrete and went down pretty hard. Ripped pants and skinned hands and knees. When I got to the top I couldn't see a thing.
The view was NOT worth the trip.
I telephoned the tennis star Serena Williams for an interview and asked her, “What’s your favourite planet?”
Her: It’s Venus.
Me: Sorry Venus, would you put Serena on the phone?
Beer is the greatest beverage on earth.
That's my pint of view, anyway.
What do planets like to read?
Comet books.
When God integrated Planet Earth, he didn’t forget his integral calculus lesson.
He remembered to add the sea.
What did Earth say to the other planets?
Wow you guys have no life.