"What did the yogi tell the door-to-door salesperson who came to his home selling vacuum cleaners? Too many attachments!"
- Sadhana Yoga
“Somedays you eat salad and go do Yoga. Somedays you eat cupcakes and refuse to put on pants. This is called balance.” — Unknown
“Yoga instructor just emailed to say class is moved and thanks for our flexibility.” – Unknown
“If you think I’m funny now, you should see me when I miss Yoga.” — Anonymous
“I'm not napping this is savasana.”
- Berndt Vogel
“I only go to yoga to drink wine, so I’m good. I just throw the calories right back in.” – Kaley Cuoco
“Keep calm and ommm… nonommm…” — Anonymous
“I got chucked out of yoga class after misinterpreting Half-Moon Pose.” – Unknown
“Yoga is almost like music in a way; there’s no end to it.” — Sting
“An instructor once gave the following cue in yoga class: “Relax your pancreas.” I don’t even know where my pancreas is, never mind how to relax it! I giggled for the rest of the class.” – Mel Farrimond
"Yoga class helps me calm down from the agonizing stress of trying to get to yoga class on time."
– Sadhguru
“Yoga class helps me calm down from the agonizing stress of trying to get to yoga class on time.” — Unknown
“I really regret going to a Yoga class today… said no one ever.” — Unknown
“Yoga is too slow.” — Rob Gronkowski
“I’ve got 99 problems and I’m gonna go to yoga and solve about 53 of them.” -Unknown
“Yoga class? I thought you said ‘pour a glass’.” – Unknown
“Yoga. Because punching people is frowned upon.” — Anonymous
“How to get a yoga body: 1. Have a body 2. Do yoga.” – Unknown
I rang up a yoga instructor and asked which class I should take. She said, “How flexible are you?” I said, “I can’t do Tuesdays.” – Unknown
“I talked to a wild group last night. I knew it the minute someone yelled ‘Louder!’ during the silent meditation. – Robert Orben”
“I do Yoga to relieve stress… Just kidding I drink wine in yoga pants.” — Anonymous
“Yoga pants. Because jeans are stressful and you don’t need that in your life.” -Unknown
“Sign for a beginner’s yoga class: Enquire Within.” – Unknown
“A day without yoga is like a sundae without sprinkles” — Emma Mildon
“A photographer gets people to pose for him. A yoga instructor gets people to pose for themselves.” — Terri Guillemets
“I remember when yoga was called Twister.” – Unknown
"Is taco yoga a thing yet? Someone get on that."
- Chisty Lowe
"Yoga is a way of getting totally drunk – not on alcohol but on life."
- Sadhguru
“When Chuck Norris does yoga, the sun salutes him.” – Unknown
“Thanks to yoga, I now gently stretch to conclusions rather than jumping to them.” – Unknown
“Me to my students every day: Close your eyes. If you can still see me, it could be a sign that your eyes are still open.” – Unknown
“I think yoga should be for everyone, not just the folks who change their name to something Hindu.” — Tara Stiles
“I like tea and yoga, but I don’t do yoga.” – Moby
“If you fall, I’ll be there. Love, Your Mat” -Unknown