"The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again."
Erma Bombeck
"Run like hell and get the agony over with."
Clarence DeMar
"Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of de feet."
Unknown
"It is true that speed kills. In distance running, it kills anyone who does not have it."
Brooks Johnson
"How do you know if someone ran a marathon? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you."
Jimmy Fallon
"Act like a horse. Be dumb. Just run."
Jumbo Elliot
"It's a hill. Get over it."
From a runner's T-shirt
"If God invented marathons to keep people from doing anything more stupid, the triathlon must have taken him completely by surprise."
P.Z. Pearce
"I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting they looked to morning motorists, they would stay home and do sit-ups."
Rita Rudner
“Running a marathon takes balls, other sports just play with them.” – Unknown
"Running makes me feel less like I want to kill people."
From a runner's T-shirt
"Running won't solve all your problems. But then again, neither will housework."
Unknown
"Start slow, then taper off."
Walt Stack
"Remember, the second most important thing to choosing the right shoe is choosing the left one."
Unknown
"It's rude to count people as you pass them. Out loud."
From an Adidas ad
“Running: Cheaper than therapy.”
-seen on runner’s T-shirt
"Good things come slow. Especially in distance running."
Bill Dellinger
"I go running when I have to. Like when the ice cream truck is doing sixty."
Wendy Liebman
"Slow runners make fast runners look good. Thank you."
From the back of a T-shirt
"A good run is like a cup of coffee. I'm much nicer after I've had one."
Unknown