The salesman at the furniture store told me "This sofa will seat 5 people without any problems!"
To which I said, “Where on earth am I going to find 5 people without any problems?”
My wife was a bit down so I decided to redecorate our living room.
Thought it would chair her up but sofa she haven't even noticed
What happens when you make love on a couch?
It becomes a sectional.
I stole two sofas from death, but I wasn’t ready for the reaper cushions.
My chair is missing an arm and a leg.
That doesn't sit well with me.
My office chair broke. It’s letting me down.
My friend was bragging about his new L-shaped sofa, so I told him I had one too.
It's just lowercase.
I'm moving some couches today...
Sofa, so good!
I love my furniture... Me and my recliner go way back.
What do you call a furniture store that is over 30 miles away?
The Sofa-r store
Why does a milking chair only have three legs?
The cow has the udder.
I couldn't chair less!
I have some extra chairs in my garage for emergency seat-uations.
I've come up with a list of the top 10 types of specialized chairs.
Number 3 will shock you
I'm studying the meaning of couches in different parts of the world.
It's really PhillySOFAcal.
How many drum sets can you store on a sofa?
One per cushion
When I heard my sofa had been stolen, I thought “I’m not going to take this sitting down”.
I think a couch can endure many things, but if you take off its cushions, it would make it uncomfortable.
What do you do when you are in the wrong seat?
Stand corrected
Someone took my three-legged chair.
I guess it was stoolen
I tried to build myself an armchair, but I messed up some of the measurements and made it too wide.
So near, and yet sofa
I said to my doctor, "I usually sit on the computer 12 hours a day...is that bad?"
He replied, "That can't be too comfortable. Try a chair!"
My chair finally broke down yesterday.
It just doesn't give a sit anymore.
What did the baseball player say when the flight attendant asked what seat he was in?
"Put me in coach."
What do you call a chair in a suit?
A tuxSEATo
My husband hated my impulse purchase of a revolving chair, but then he sat on it.
Eventually he came around.
What’s a farmer’s favorite piece of furniture?
a COWch.
What do you call donating a chair?
Charity!
What does a couch say to another couch at the other side of the room?
We are sofa apart!
I was going to replace the seats at my bar
But... I just can't look at another stool sample
I'm never sure if I like rocking chairs or not.
I go back and forth on them
All the chairs in my town were stolen
The people can’t stand it.