Why did the vampire get a COVID test?
Because he was COFFIN.
The government announced that because of COVID, we can have gatherings of up to 5 people without issues.
Where the hell am I going to find 5 people without issues?
Due to covid most exotic dancers have been furloughed.
Basically, they’ve been stripped of their source of income.
Corona virus has caused our local supermarket to sell out of pasta.
All because of a fusilli people.
Please stop with all the corona jokes.
I‘m sick of it.
This Corona virus is a blessing
My wife doesn't want to travel anywhere.
She no longer buys anything online, since everything comes from China.
she doesn't go to the mall to avoid the crowds.
she spends all of her time in a mask with her mouth closed.
Best thing that has ever happened to me.
I wanna bob for your apples.
I may be dressed as a vampire tonihgt, but if you play your cards right you might be the one sucking
Me, to my wife: They said that the Covid vaccines are safe and has no side effects.
My wife: Who did?
Me: Yep.
Don't worry, the Corona Virus won't last long... It was made in China.
Is that a bat in your pocket, or does my costume excite you?
I'm using a bra for a face mask.
I like to keep abreast of corona security measures.
Why don’t we go somewhere where I can stick a candle in your jack-o-lantern?
Has Covid-19 forced you to wear glasses and a mask at the same time?
You may be entitled to condensation.
Dad jokes are like Corona.
Everybody gets It but not everyone can laugh about It.
With Corona Virus spreading, I never thought our deaths will also be..
“Made in China”
I’m no vampire but I’m fine with getting no sleep and biting your neck all night.
I know I've never been all that attractive.
But lately every woman I try to approach avoids me like the plague.
I was going to make a joke about losing your senses due to COVID.
But I decided it was poor taste.
What movie perfectly describes the corona virus?
No country for old men.
As the local drunk, I'm quite worried about the corona virus.
It's got potential tequila lot of people.
Nice pumpkins!
What quarantine really taught me?
That you don't really need fun to have alcohol.
Hey, Baby do you want to see what tricks my treat could do?
Flat earthers fear 6 feet social distancing could push some people over the edge.
Who is running the corona virus relief?
WHO??
Listen to them, children of the night. Let’s give them some competition.
Ok, so if the Corona Virus isn't about beer, why do I keep hearing about cases of it?
Turns out my dad who’s a locksmith still has to go to work during lockdown.
He’s a key worker, you see.
What did the Indian boy say to his parent before going into self isolation?
Mumbai.
I would totally carve your pumpkin.
What do Muslims do during the coronavirus outbreak?
They stay in Quran-tine.
That mask is becoming on you. If it were me, I’d be coming too.
Hey Baby, wanna find out why they call me Pumpkin-Head?
Dolly Parton partially funded Moderna's COVID Vaccine.
It comes in two very large dosey-doses.
Is that a magic wand in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
Are you dressed up as a tree? Cause you’re giving me wood.
People with 20-20 vision..
Why you didn't warn us before??
Which Pokémon has Covid?
Pik-achoo.
I’m throwing a COVID-19 party this weekend.
None of you are invited.
I got my COVID-19 vaccine from a "doctor" who approached me in a downtown alley after midnight, offering it for $50 cash.
It was a shot in the dark, but I took it.
I should have dressed up as a ghost tonight so I could let you under my sheets.
Hey, my parents are out of town. That means we have the haunted mansion all to ourselves.
My mom always told me I wouldn't accomplish anything by lying in bed all day.
But look at me now, I'm saving the world.
If Corona virus is just a beer virus..
Then it’s just a yeast infection!
I went to the chemist today and asked the assistant "what kills the Corona Virus?"
She replied to me "Ammonia Cleaner"
I said "Oh, I am sorry, I thought you worked here."
Call me a pirate and give me that booty.
My daughter told me COVID stinks and she misses her teacher...
I told her "I Ms. your teacher too."
I just asked the wife to get into her nurse's uniform.
She said "Why? Are you feeling horny?"
"No we need bread!"
Girl, you make my crotch rise from the dead