Since i have COVID people tell me i enjoy bad music and movies
Guess i have become tasteless.
Why don’t we go somewhere where I can stick a candle in your jack-o-lantern?
Hey Baby, wanna find out why they call me Pumpkin-Head?
Girl, are you the Wuhan Corona Virus?
Because you’re taking my breath away.
Why did Princess Leia contract coronavirus?
Because she went to woo Han.
The government announced that because of COVID, we can have gatherings of up to 5 people without issues.
Where the hell am I going to find 5 people without issues?
I’m no vampire but I’m fine with getting no sleep and biting your neck all night.
Why are people buying so much toilet paper because of the corona virus?
Because when one person sneezes, 100 people shit themselves.
Woke up with sweats afraid I'd contracted the corona virus...
Changed into jeans and was all good.
Girl, you make my crotch rise from the dead
I tried to come up with a joke about social distancing but this is as close as I could get.
I really hope corona virus can't spread through s*x
It would be so lonely being the last man on Earth.
You should dress up as a baker for Halloween with that set of buns.
Dad jokes are like Corona.
Everybody gets It but not everyone can laugh about It.
They found a plant that cures COVID-19!
It’s called plant yourself on the couch.
Dolly Parton partially funded Moderna's COVID Vaccine.
It comes in two very large dosey-doses.
Hey, Baby do you want to see what tricks my treat could do?
I wanna bob for your apples.
I was going to make a joke about losing your senses due to COVID.
But I decided it was poor taste.
What movie perfectly describes the corona virus?
No country for old men.
I want a taste of your Milky Way.
Corona crisis reaches new level:
Iran out of toilet paper.
Due to covid most exotic dancers have been furloughed.
Basically, they’ve been stripped of their source of income.
The amount of bad Covid-19 jokes being circulated is starting to reach alarming figures
Some scientists suspect that it might be a pundemic.
I really hope Santa can figure out how to make all his deliveries this year due to Covid-19......
I hear he just ran out of santa-tizer.
If Corona virus is just a beer virus..
Then it’s just a yeast infection!
Corona Beer sales falter amid Corona virus crisis...
Guess their viral marketing strategy failed.
Is that a magic wand in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
Flat earthers fear 6 feet social distancing could push some people over the edge.
With all this spare time on their hands people are going to start pursuing their passions. I wouldn't be surprised to sudden explosion in the arts, a renewal in scientific interest, and a mass proliferation of original content.
A coronaissance, if you will.
With all this talk of Corona Virus, the people who make sanitising gel are rubbing their hands together.
What quarantine really taught me?
That you don't really need fun to have alcohol.
As the local drunk, I'm quite worried about the corona virus.
It's got potential tequila lot of people.
Are you dressed up as a tree? Cause you’re giving me wood.
I'm tired of this old broom. Got anything else I can ride?
I like my girls how I like my Covid.
19 and easily spread.
I sneezed in the bank today, it was the most attention I have received in the last 10 years.
Hi, I'm a zombie, can I eat you?
My real costume is at home in a box under my bed.
I may be dressed as a vampire tonihgt, but if you play your cards right you might be the one sucking
We are 11 days into self-isolation ands it is really upsetting me to witness my wife standing at the living room window gazing aimlessly into space with tears running down her cheeks.
Don’t get me wrong, I empathize with her. I’ve considered letting her in many times, but rules are rules.
John Travolta has been diagnosed with the Corona Virus.
He had chills that were multiplying.
This Corona virus is a blessing
My wife doesn't want to travel anywhere.
She no longer buys anything online, since everything comes from China.
she doesn't go to the mall to avoid the crowds.
she spends all of her time in a mask with her mouth closed.
Best thing that has ever happened to me.
You know why women's eyes are so noticeable these days?
It's the mask era.
Corona virus has caused our local supermarket to sell out of pasta.
All because of a fusilli people.
I am a mean green machine.
Nice pumpkins!
There’s no trick in these pants.
What does a person with Covid like to drink?
Coughy.
I feel really bad for the class of 2020. They say the year really flies by.
I just didn’t realize it would Zoom.