I don’t believe in boats
I have yacht to see one.
If I ever get drafted into the Navy, and they make me choose what boat to get on.
I would just say frig it.
Why don't boats have funerals?
They have wakes.
Did you hear about the boat that crashed into the beach?
The captain fell asleep and the crew didn't realize until they were already in the no wake zone.
You know what really floats my boat?
Surface tension.
What do you call a boat full of polite football players?
A good sportsman ship.
My writer buddy went to buy a new boat...
He named it Penman-Ship.
What do you call a boat in training?
An apprenticeship.
I'm reading a book about a sadistic evil man who attaches ridges from boat hulls to his victims.
He's a mad keeler.
Did you hear about the sea captain who made a special salt-proof boat for the salty waters of the ocean?
It was a sailing solution to cross a saline solution.
Why don't they make boats out of peppers?
Because they're always capsaicin!
Why do all the boats in Scandinavia have barcodes on the sides of them?
It makes it easier to... scan da navy in.
I was sailing my boat when a massive hand rose out of the water and then slowly disappeared...
I thought, 'That's the biggest wave I've ever seen!'
I was surprised when I saw a boat in the driveway so I asked my wife about it.
She said there was a great sail.
Did you hear about the boat dock that committed murder?
He’s going to be judged by a jury of its piers.
I took my boat out to go fishing today. I looked over and saw my neighbor’s dock was parallel to mine.
I guess I found my self in a real “para-docks”
My boat is starting to sink, I'm going to sell it.
See my boat listing in the paper.
I love driving my car, makes me feel like I'm charge of a big boat
especially when it's on cruise control
Where do boats go when they feel sick?
To the dock.
Before my surgery my anaesthetist offered to knock me out with gas or a boat paddle.
It was an ether/oar situation.