What is a lightyear?
The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
Where do aliens park their flying saucers?
At a parking meteor.
How will you save yourself if you come across an aggressive alien? Give him some space.
What do you call an alien with three eyes?
An aliiien.
What time do spacemen get up? Alien in the morning.
How do you get a baby alien to sleep?
Rocket.
What do you call a wizard aboard a spacecraft?
A flying sorcerer.
Have you heard the one about the spaceship that came to Earth?
Never mind its over your head.
What do you call an alien spaceship that's leaking water?
A crying saucer.
What do you call an alien spaceship that goes from planet to planet to planet? A UF-hoe.
Why don't aliens get hungry after being blasted into space?
Because they've just had a big launch.
Have you heard the one about the spaceship that came to Earth?
Never mind its over your head.
What will you do if you come across a green alien? I’ll simply wait until it’s ripe.
What do you call an overweight alien?
An extra cholesterol.
What do aliens prefer to drink?
Gravi-tea.
How do you organise a welcome party for an alien race?
You planet.
What's E.T. short for?
Because he's got little legs.
How did the aliens hurt the farmer?
They trod on his corn.