Don’t expect to hear yourself urinate after taking the Pfizer vaccine.
I had a doctor tell me the P was silent.
Serotonin and Dopamine: Technically, the only things you enjoy.
What is blood's message to the world? B POSITIVE.
Biology - It grows on you.
What was the biologist wearing on his first date with a hot chick? Designer jeans.
I have faith in Pfizer and its Covid vaccine, because they also make Viagra.
If Pfizer can raise the dead, it can save the living.
I can't imagine the stress put on the workers in trying to figure out the newest flu vaccine...
It probably puts a strain on the staff.
If Russia wants to be the first country to produce a vaccine ...
... Then Soviet.
I hear there's a new COVID-19 vaccine delivered via an audio interface as music.
It is hoped that this will lead to heard immunity.
The Covid-19 vaccine should be tested on politicians first...
If they survive, the vaccine is safe.
If they don't, the country is safe.
I was going to become a biologist. But all the endless coursework on hearts and lungs and kidneys and so on just made it seem like one long organ recital.
What does a biologist wear when they're going out?
Designer genes.
How did the English major define microtome on his biology exam? An itsy bitsy book.
What did the Italian marine Biologist say when asked to identify an eel?
That's a moray!
Whats The Most tiniest Virus Ever? "smallpox".
Organ donors really put their heart into it.
What do you call the leader of a biology gang?
The Nucleboss.
How is a dog and a marine biologist alike? One wags a tail and the other tags a whale.
Bacteria is the only culture some people have.
What did the male stamen say to the female pistil? "I like your style."
Dolly Parton partially funded Moderna's COVID Vaccine.
It comes in two very large dosey-doses.
My vaccine dad joke failed.
But it was worth a shot.
How did the herpetologist know he would be married soon? He caught the garter snake.
Why did the Russian vaccine cross the road?
To get to the other side effects.
You know what it's called when you hurry to develop a vaccine?
... Russian.
What did one brain say to another?
I lobe you.
How do you know your dehydrated? You can hear your red blood cells crenating.
What did the femur say to the patella? I kneed you.
How do you tell the difference between boys and girls?
Take their genes down.
I heard the government is going to put chips inside people with Covid vaccines...
I hope I get Doritos.
How do you identify a bald eagle? All his feathers are combed over to one side.
Did you hear about the famous microbiologist who traveled in thirty different countries and learned to speak six languages? He was a man of many cultures.
Hey why Are The Viruses All Gone? Cause They "flu" AWAY.
How does Juliet maintain a constant body temperature? Romeostasis.
If this new covid vaccine works...
...It'll be a real shot in the arm for 2021.
Why was the scuba diver failing Biology? Because he was below "C" level.
Two red blood cells met and fell in love, but alas, it was all in vein.
What did the Endoplasmic Reticulum say to the Golgi. I like your body, and the Golgi said it's complex.
Where do hippos go to university? Hippocampus.
What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexics Association.
With all the talk of the pandemic and vaccines recently, I decided to consult a micro-biologist.
I thought they'd be smaller.
What did Russian do after they made the vaccine ?
They Put-in.
What type of flowers does everybody have? two-lips.
Heard Russia has the vaccine to Coronavirus. I'm probably not Putin that into my body.
My wife asked, “If someone’s body just isn’t fighting the virus, would getting the vaccine help?”
I told her I think it’s worth a shot.
There's now a vaccine to make you better at geometry.
It's called Pythagorean Serum.
I don't think I need a spine.
It's holding me back.
What do you call doctors who make vaccines for the flu?
Flu-Fighters.
Hey kids! I went back in time and formed a British 80s pop group called The Vaccine!
And now The Cure is no longer necessary!
I created a vaccine for apathy, but unfortunately no one seems interested.