How do you identify a bald eagle? All his feathers are combed over to one side.
I don't think I need a spine.
It's holding me back.
I heard the government is going to put chips inside people with Covid vaccines...
I hope I get Doritos.
How is a dog and a marine biologist alike? One wags a tail and the other tags a whale.
Heard Russia has the vaccine to Coronavirus. I'm probably not Putin that into my body.
What do you call doctors who make vaccines for the flu?
Flu-Fighters.
What did one brain say to another?
I lobe you.
I have faith in Pfizer and its Covid vaccine, because they also make Viagra.
If Pfizer can raise the dead, it can save the living.
Why did the Russian vaccine cross the road?
To get to the other side effects.
Using vaccines is...
Antibody-building.
Working on lab science animals is a real rat race.
Why was the scuba diver failing Biology? Because he was below "C" level.
How did the English major define microtome on his biology exam? An itsy bitsy book.
Serotonin and Dopamine: Technically, the only things you enjoy.
My wife asked, “If someone’s body just isn’t fighting the virus, would getting the vaccine help?”
I told her I think it’s worth a shot.
Why do anti vaxxers hate vaccine jokes?
They never get them.
My vaccine dad joke failed.
But it was worth a shot.
Do you find bone puns humerus?
I was going to become a biologist. But all the endless coursework on hearts and lungs and kidneys and so on just made it seem like one long organ recital.
What did the Endoplasmic Reticulum say to the Golgi. I like your body, and the Golgi said it's complex.
What is blood's message to the world? B POSITIVE.
What did the male stamen say to the female pistil? "I like your style."
You know what it's called when you hurry to develop a vaccine?
... Russian.
What type of flowers does everybody have? two-lips.
What did one cell say to his sister cell when she stepped in his toe? Mitosis.
I can't imagine the stress put on the workers in trying to figure out the newest flu vaccine...
It probably puts a strain on the staff.
I created a vaccine for apathy, but unfortunately no one seems interested.
What was the biologist wearing on his first date with a hot chick? Designer jeans.