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Mass Jokes

Romantic Pick Up Lines
If looks could kill you, you’d surely be a weapon of mass destruction.
Corona Virus Jokes
With all this spare time on their hands people are going to start pursuing their passions. I wouldn't be surprised to sudden explosion in the arts, a renewal in scientific interest, and a mass proliferation of original content.
A coronaissance, if you will.
Forgiveness Is a Tricky Thing
Fred was about to tee off on the first hole when a second golfer (George) approached and asked if he could join him. Fred said that he usually played alone, but agreed to the twosome. They were even after the first few holes. George said, "We're about evenly matched, how about playing for five bucks a hole?" Fred said that he wasn't much for betting, but agreed. George easily won the remaining 16 holes. They walked off number eighteen while George counted his $80.00. He then confessed that he was the pro at a neighboring course and “liked to pick on suckers.” Fred, shocked, revealed that he was the Parish Priest. The pro was flustered and apologetic and offered to return the money. The Priest said, "You won fair and square I was foolish to bet with you. Keep your winnings." The embarrassed pro asked, "Please, is there anything I can do to make it up to you?" The Priest said, "Well, you could come to Mass on Sunday and make a donation. And, if you want to bring your Mother and Father along, I'll marry them.”
Crow Puns
Did you hear about the guy who killed a group of catholic crows?
It was Mass murder
Gorilla Puns
What did the gorilla say after spending one month at te gym?
Geez, gain a little muscle mass, and everybody acuses you of steroids. As if eating too many bananas wasn't dopey enough!
Physics Puns
May the mass times acceleration be with you.
One Liners and Short Jokes
The difference between a GEEK and a NERD.

Geek: "May the force be with you!"
Nerd: "May the force be equal to the mass multiplied by acceleration."
"
The Jewish Bra
Sam goes into Macy's, to the lingerie department, and he says to the salesgirl, "My wife has sent me in for a Jewish bra, size 34B, and she said that you'd know what I meant." The saleslady says, "Boy, it's been a long time since anybody's asked me for a Jewish bra. They usually ask me for a Catholic bra or a Salvation Army bra or a Presbyterian bra." He says, "Well, what's the difference?" "Well," she explains, "the Catholic bra supports the masses, the Salvation Army bra uplifts the downfallen, and the Presbyterian bra keeps them staunch and upright." He goes, "Well, then what's a Jewish bra?" "Oh, a Jewish bra makes mountains out of molehills."
Gun Puns
What sound did the gun make when the priest shot through two benches to kill a mass shooter?
PEW PEW
Space Puns
How will you have communion in the space if you won’t have mass?
Irish Puns
Why did Saint Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland?
They were causing mass hiss-teria!
Puns
Imagine if Americans switched from pounds to kilograms overnight.
There would be mass confusion.