Funny News Headlines

Enjoy the funniest news headline one liners, most of which come from real newspapers!

Funny News Headlines

Deaf Mute Gets New Hearing In Killing
Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
Shot Off Woman's Leg Helps Nicklaus To 66
Man is Fatally Slain.
Two Convicts Evade Noose, Jury Hung
An Australian army vehicle worth $74,000 has gone missing after being painted with camouflage.
“I Thought He Was Going to Kill Me”: One Woman’s Harrowing Misunderstanding of How Haircuts Work
Dealers Will Hear Car Talk At Noon
Lawmen From Mexico Barbecue Guests
Bodies Needed To Look After Graveyard
Nicaragua Sets Goal to Wipe out Literacy.
Federal Agents raid gun shop, find weapons
Queen Mary Having Bottom Scraped
Death Causes Loneliness, Feeling Of Isolation
Is There A Ring Of Debris Around Uranus?
Police Begin Campaign To Run Down Jaywalkers
Four Battered In Fish And Chip Shop
Miners Refuse to Work after Death.
Hospitals Are Sued By 7 Foot Doctors
Killer Sentenced To Die For Second Time In Ten Years
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges.
Cold Wave Linked To Temperatures
Alzheimer's Center Prepares For An Affair To Remember.
Grandmother Of Eight Makes Hole In One
CRIME: Sheriff Asks For 13.7% Increase
Stolen Prosthetic Arm Discovered in a Secondhand Shop.
Blind Woman Gets New Kidney From Dad She Hasn't Seen In Years
Autos killing 110 a day, let's resolve to do better
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
Gas rig men grilled by villagers - The Oxford Times
Arson Suspect is Held in Massachusetts Fire
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group.
Miners Refuse To Work After Death
Deaf mute gets new hearing
Bank Drive-in Window Blocked by Board
Goldfish Is Saved From Drowning
30 Year Friendship Ends At Alter
Child’s Death Ruins Couple’s Holiday
Two Sisters Reunite after Eighteen Years at Checkout Counter.
Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing
Kicking Baby Considered Healthy
Two Soviet Ships Collide - One Dies.
Flat earthers fear 6 feet social distancing could push some people over the edge.
Foul Play Suspected In Death Of Man Found Handless, Bound And Hanged
Stolen Painting Found By Tree
Circumcision Now Seen As Pointless.
Filming in cemetery angers residents - The Evening Standard
Flashier Great Tits Produce Stronger Sperm, Bird Study Shows.
Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim
Have your home exterminated. Get rid of aunts.