"Family Vacation (n.) A time for you to remember why your family never spends any time together."
"There are two kinds of travel – first class and with children."
– Robert Benchley
"Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city."
– George Burns
"If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them and half as much money."
– Abigail Van Buren
"Okay, we’re all like 90% happy and 10% sunburnt."
"Like gum to a shoe, you’re stuck with me and I’m stuck with you."
"Summer vacations are a time when parents realize that teachers are grossly underpaid."
"Teaching kids to count is fine, but teaching them what counts is best."
— Bob Talbert
"I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home."
– Robert Orben
"Being on vacation with my family has brought me so much closer to my iPad."
"A road trip is a way for the whole family to spend time together and annoy each other in interesting new places."
– Tom Lichtenheld
"Europeans: I drove 40 minutes to spend the weekend in Paris, then popped to Germany to visit family on the way home. Australians: I was in Queensland and drove for 18 hours. Now I’m still in Queensland."
"You call it a pandemonium. We call it a family vacation."
"You call it chaos. We call it a family vacation."
"Parents don’t really go on holidays. They just look after their kids in a different country for a while."
"Help me! I'm on a family vacation!"
“The mud will wash off but the memories will last a lifetime.”
"Everyone’s a little bit crazy and a little bit loud. But everyone’s sharing a generous amount of love."
"You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance."
– Franklin P. Jones
"There is no WiFi in the forest but you will find a better connection."
"By 35, if I’m not engaged or already starting a family, I declare myself the aunt who’s always traveling & comes to family events tipsy."
"A vacation frequently means that the family goes away for a rest, accompanied by a mother who sees that the others get it."
— Marcelene Cox
"When traveling with someone, take large doses of patience and tolerance with your morning coffee."
– Helen Hayes