“Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?”
– George Carlin
"Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand-brake on."
- Maxwell Maltz
“I love road trips. You get into this Zen rhythm; throw the sense of time out the window.”
– Miriam Toews
"You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive."
"Driving is a spectacular form of amnesia. Everything is to be discovered, everything to be obliterated."
– Jean Baudrillard
“The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we all believe that we are above-average drivers.”
– Dave Barry
“A tourist is a fellow who drives thousands of miles so he can be photographed standing in front of his car.”
– Emile Ganest
“A car’s weakest part is the nut holding the steering wheel.”
“If everything comes your way, you are in the wrong lane.”
“Never have more children than you have car windows.”
– Erma Bombeck
“Aerodynamics are for people who can’t build engines.”
– Enzo Ferrari
“Roadtripophobia (n.) The fear of not having any road trips currently booked.“
“If you don’t like how I drive, get off the sidewalk.”
“To attract men, I wear a perfume called ‘New Car Interior.'”
– Rita Rudner
“You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine'.”
― Tommy Cooper
“Road Trips: Because they’re cheaper than therapy.”
“Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.”
– George Carlin