Breathing Jokes

Once you finish deep breathing, do you want to start panting?
So my daughter is calling me all excited. I come by her room to her holding her cup above her head and says "Dad look..."
"I'm breathing underwater."
If I had to choose between breathing and loving you, I'd take my last breath to say "I Love You".
Henry VIII had breathing troubles - he had no heir!
The Ultimate Cure A pharmacist comes back from his lunch to the pharmacy. As he approaches, he sees a man outside the pharmacy clutching onto a pole for dear life, barely breathing, not moving, not twitching a muscle, just standing there, frozen. The pharmacist goes up to his assistant and asks: "What's the matter with that guy? Wasn't he in here earlier?" "Yes he was." Replies the assistant. "He had the most terrible cough and none of my prescriptions seemed to help." "Well, he seems to be fine now." "Sure he does. I gave him a box of laxatives. Now he won't dare cough!"
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