Why did the rabbit cross the road?
It had to get from hare to there.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was Thanksgiving Day, and it wanted people to think it was a chicken!
Why did the man with one hand cross the road?
To get to the second-hand shop.
Why did the spy cross the road?
Because he was never on your side.
What did the buffalo say when his son crossed the road?
-Bison.
Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn’t have the guts.
Why did Hans cross the road alone?
Hans wanted to travel solo.
Why did the bunny cross the road?
To go to the hare dresser.
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t chicken!
Why did the alphabet cross the road?
To get from Point A to Point B.
Why did the horse cross the road?
To get to the apple store.
Why did the queen cross the road?
To get to coronation street.
What kind of cat always crosses the road?
A jaguar.
Why did the clock cross the road?
It couldn’t wait.
Why did the wolf take so long to cross the road?
It was pretending to be a snail.
Why did Chuck Norris cross the road?
He didn’t — the road moved back underneath him.
Why did the goldfish cross the road?
Because the chicken was on holiday.
How do animals know when to cross the road?
The chameleon changes from red to green.
Why did the monkey cross the road?
Because the chicken retired.
Why did the Communist wait till the last minute to cross the road?
He was Stalin.
Why did the sheep cross the road?
To get to the baa-baa shop for a haircut.
Why did the dog cross the road?
Because he was chasing the chicken.
How did the sushi cross the road?
It was rolling.
Why did the snail take so long to cross the road?
It was feeling sluggish.
Why did my wife cross the road?
To go back to the same shoe shop we went to three hours ago.
Why did the zebra cross the road?
Because it was a zebra crossing.
Why does the tin keep crossing the road?
Because it can.
Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
Because chickens didn’t exist yet.
Why did the monster truck drive on the sidewalk?
Because he didn’t want to run over the chicken!
Why did the fish cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
Why did the nose cross the road?
Because he was tired of getting picked on.
Why did the reindeer cross the road?
Because he was tied to a chicken!
Why did the doctor cross the road?
Hard to say really. Could be any number of reasons.
Why did the fish cross the road?
To get to its school.
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get out of the barking lot.
How did the sheep cross the road?
It ram across.
Why did the horse dance while crossing the road?
He was horsing around.
Why did the dragon cross the road?
He was dragged on by his mum.
Why did the czar cross the road?
To get to his car.
Why couldn't the mathematician cross the road?
Because he kept trying to half the distance.
Why did the raccoon cross the road?
He saw you put out the garbage.
Which bug always crosses the road?
A beetle.
Why did the engineer cross the road?
Because he looked in the files, and that’s what they did last time.
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
He was playing Fetch with a boomerang.
Why did the elephant cross the road?
The chicken couldn’t be bothered anymore.
Why did the toddler cross the road?
He wanted to pet the chicken.
Why did the lion cross the road?
He was bored of lion around.
Why didn’t the flamingo cross the road?
Because he’s not a chicken.
Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.