What do aspens wear to school? A tree-shirt.
What happens when you blend an artificial waterway with a tree? You get a root canal.
Why are trees such great thieves? They really have sticky fingers.
I told my friend a tree pun.
He was stumped.
Why are dogwood trees amazing pets? They have a great bark and a wooden bite.
Why was the evergreen so lonely in high school? She was always pining to become a part of the poplar kids.
Don’t ask me for any tree puns.
Acacia haven’t noticed I’m all out.
Did you hear about the bank that wanted to put an ATM up a tree? If it works, they are going to expand the idea to other branches.
Why are trees so silly? All of their puns arboring and acorny.
Why are trees a popular Christmas decoration? They look good in boughs.
. How can you easily identify a dogwood tree? By listening to the bark.
So I cut down a tree using my vision today
It’s true, I SAW it with my own eyes.
What did the Christmas tree tell his crush? I pine for you.
Why are trees the largest plant? Because they are truly tree-mendous.
Why are trees the best frenemies? They are great at throwing shade.
Why are trees such great drivers? They always take the shortest root.
When is a piece of wood made king? when its a ruler
What did Sherlock Holmes say when he caught the Christmas tree bandit? It was elemen-tree, my dear Watt-son.
Where do birch trees keep their jewelry? In the river bank.
What happened to the wooden car with a wooden engine and wheels? It wooden go at all.
What did the trees wear when they went to a pool party? Swimming trunks.
Where did the Adansonia tree go to get a quick trim? To the baobarber.
Not many people liked the new tree I planted.
It wasn’t very poplar.
What is it called when a tree has back problems?
ScoliOAKsis
Why were the spruces in a group of three? They like to travel as a tree-o.
What is the tree’s least favorite month of the year? SepTIMBERRRR.
What looks like half a pine tree? The other half.
What is the hardest part about being a tree? You have so many limbs, but you still can’t walk.
What did the beaver tell the tree? It has really been nice gnawing you.
What types of plants do you get after you plant kisses? Tulips.
What do you see when an elephant hides behind a tree?
The trunks
What do trees drink at their parties? Root beer.
Can you tell me what type of weeping tree this is? Yes, but you willow me one later.
What do you call a nice tree that does not have any teeth? Sweetgums.
Why was the dogwood always making bad choices? Because he kept barking up the wrong tree.
Finally put up the Christmas tree...
It really spruced up the room.
What flowering plant is an amazing equestrian? The horse chestnut.
Why are bad knitters and Christmas trees alike? They both drop their needles.
Why don’t trees travel in groups? Because two’s a company, but tree’s a crowd.
What did Betula pendula tell her little sister when she was annoyed? Leaf me alone, birch.
Is it hard to count conifers? It’s as simple as one, two, tree!
Why did the dunce get hurt after raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.
How does a bee travel to a tree? They get on the buzz.
I fernly beleaf my tree puns are qualitree, you can leaf me alone if you disagreen.
What did the tree say when it fell down?
"Call pine one one!"
What is the same shape and size as a sequoia tree, but weighs nothing at all? The tree’s shadow.
Why couldn’t the oak tree make friends? All of the other trees thought that he was a bit shady.
Why do trees have to drink responsibly? Otherwise, they become a bunch of trunk idiots.
What do you give to a sick citrus tree to make it feel better? Lemon aid.
What do chic evergreens wear for cruelty-free fashion? Faux fir.