Living costs on the moon would probably be out of this world.
What is the best way to observe the two planets between Jupiter and Neptune?
Saturn Uranus.
The moon asked the sun: Buddy when you are so hot, why are you single yet?
Is that the Dog star? You can’t be Sirius!
Those who study the moon for their course or as a habit, are optimists. And that is because they look at the brighter side always.
How will you make a baby astronaut fall asleep peacefully? Rock-et.
Where do the astronauts park their vehicles? At the parking meteors.
What are the best kind of flowers to get your girlfriend after screwing up?
Whoopsie Daisies
How much far can you see with your naked eyes, on a clear day? 92,955,807 miles (to the sun).
What do you call an alien with three eyes?
An aliiien.
The moon landing is obviously fake.
The moon is clearly still up there.
What all kinds of stars wear the sunglasses? The movie stars.
What kind of music would planets prefer to hear? NepTUNEs.
Why don't aliens get hungry after being blasted into space?
Because they've just had a big launch.
Old astronomers got so tired of waiting for the sun to go down, that they decided to pack it up and call it a day.
This year, I've really enjoyed watching 'Planet Earth'.
It's a shame that it only has four seasons.
What do you call people who go to space? Icetronauts.
Why people did not like the restaurant on? Because there was literally no atmosphere.
A space fish is usually called starfish.
Why does the earth appreciate the moon so much?
It keeps the oceans tidy.
How will you have communion in the space if you won’t have mass?
Any proof that Saturn married more than once? Well, he do has a lot of rings.
Canada is planning a mission to the moon
They're calling the spaceship the Apollo-G.
What do planets like to read?
Comet books.
What's E.T. short for?
Because he's got little legs.
Why haven't the aliens visited earth yet?
They read the reviews... only one star.
Well, there are mixed reviews. People say the food is great. But there is no atmosphere or ambience.
Why do all kids want to be an astronaut?
Because there is no pressure.
I could have been an astronaut...
but my parents told me the sky was the limit.
How does one astronaut says sorry on the moon tell another astronaut? He Apollo-gises.
Why does Moon goes to the bank? To change his quarters.
Why did Neil Armstrong pee right after he made his first step on the moon?
He wanted to go where no man had gone before.
Where do aliens park their flying saucers?
At a parking meteor.
How do astronauts prepare for a birthday party
They planet.
I’m currently reading a book on anti-gravity and it’s impossible to put it down.
Got my friend an unnecessarily large rocket for bonfire night.
He's over the moon!He's over the moon!
What do you think holds the moon up? Moonbeams.
What do you do when your friend is a claustrophobic astronaut?
You give him a little space.
How does a quarter moon always feel?
Crestfallen.
What does someone mean by a light year? The same as a regular year, but with less calories and fat.
Living on Earth might be expensive. But we surely get a free trip around the sun every year!
There’s a big thunderstorm. The road is blocked by a big mudslide. A little boy asks his dad, “Why does earth fall down like that?”
His dad answers, “It’s terrain.”
How do you get a baby alien to sleep?
Rocket.
What do you say to an astronaut looking for a car park
There's a spaceman.
My daughter asked me, "Why are the two planets coming close together?"
"Well, you see... When two planets love each other they can come together in holy astro nomy."
If athletes can get “Athletes foot”, what can astronauts get? Missile Toe.
Last evening I walked up the hill in the park to see the planets. Stumbled over a lip in the concrete and went down pretty hard. Ripped pants and skinned hands and knees. When I got to the top I couldn't see a thing.
The view was NOT worth the trip.
Why these days, the Moon is up till so late? Don’t worry, it is just going through a phase.
Why doesn’t the sun go to college? Because it has a million degrees!
Why is Jupiter so sad and heartbroken? Because his crush wants a plutonic relationship with him.