I was walking down the road and slipped on some dog poo. Someone came up behind me and slipped as well. Trying to sympathize, I said "I just did that!"
They slapped me and said "use the toilet next time"
Do people have strange scents of humor if they laugh at their own farts?
In a recent study, NASA scientists confirmed that Uranus smells like farts.
Never fart in an apple store
They don't have windows.
What type of poo smells good?
Shampoo.
After letting elephant dung dry in the sun, it's nearly indestructible.
In fact, I'd say it's pretty heavy doody.
What do you call a person who starts their own cow poop business?
An entre-manure.
Turns out our washing machine DOES have a “baby poop” setting.
It’s called “Heavy Doody”
Cut a piece of poo into three pieces today.
Now I have turds.
Dung beetle walks into a bar....
"Is this stool taken?"
I was walking along when I saw a pile of dog sh** on the side of the street, a little further on I saw an identical one.
That was a crazy deja poo.
What is a dung beetle's favorite holiday song?
"All I Want for Christmas is Poo"
I like telling fart jokes.
They are tough to hold in.
My wife is mad at me because I took a dump on the roof...
How can I wipe the slate clean?
What do you call coffee made from poo?
Crappuccino.
what's the best day of the week to poop?
saTURDay.
A dung beetle spent an entire day rolling a ball of dung up a hill, only to have it fall down to the other side...
Needless to say, he lost his sh*t.
What do you call a cop standing on dog poo?
Officer on doody!
The scariest day of my life was when we ran into a bear taking a dump inside our campsite.
That sh** was in
Where does Batman go to take a dump?
To the batroom of course!
This morning my daughter came to me, looking concerned. She said, “Dad, I need a new bum”.
I asked, “And why is that sweetheart?”
She said, “Because mine has a crack in it!”
Where do cow farts come from?
The dairy air.
If a clown farts...
Does it smell funny?
My friend explained how powerful (yet invisible) farts work via demonstration.
I was blown away by his transparency.
People who pretends to never go taking a dump are full of sh**.
"Is it the tar that smells like farts?"
"No, it was your asphalt"
Poo jokes...
Are funny sh**.
A zoo employee was injured when a monkey threw flaming poo at him.
He suffered from turd debris burns.
Why didn’t the teacher want to fart in front of anyone?
He was a private tootor.
What do you get when you fart on your wallet?
Gas Money.
Why shouldn’t you fart on elevators?
It’s wrong on so many levels.