What did the bus say to the frog? Hop on.
Which films is the car’s favourite?
WiperBlade 1, 2 and Trinity.
My partner has been having nightmares that he’s a truck. He always wakes up tyred and exhaust-ed.
Did you hear about the 2 Tow Truck drivers who wanted to elope?
They got hitched.
Bro, are you a submarine?
Because you're so gnar.
What should you double check when buying an electric car?
That your driving license is current.
I once had my identity stolen by a cement truck driver. It took me ages to track him down, but now I have concrete evidence.
What’s the hardest part about working as a bus driver? Everyone’s talking behind your back.
Anyone who is born in a car and dies outside is known as car born die oxide.
Why couldn’t the submarine commander get to the surface after joining Reddit?
He couldn’t get any up-boats
Why didn't the bicycle want to go anywhere?
It was two tired.
There are more planes under the oceans than there are submarines up in the skies. Let that sink in...
51. What does a car yell when something goes wrong?
‘Jesus Chrysler!’
My brother has been riding a bicycle since he was 4 years old
Damn he must be very far away by now
I joined the French Submarine Corps to learn how to deal with the loss of a loved one.
They taught me periscoping techniques.
Car puns are really tiring
I watched, horrified as two trucks carrying cheese crashed into each other. De brie was all over the road.
Two trucks – one carrying strawberries and one carrying sugar – crashed. Drivers didn’t stop, and now the jam is getting thicker.
What do they play at the beginning of a car movie?
The trailer.
How does a flower propel a bicycle?
It petals!
Why did the submarine driver lose his job
Old, racist tweets resurfaced
What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck!
I always like to keep a jar of peanut butter in the car when I travel on a busy freeway ...
just in case there’s a traffic jam.
Why did the bus driver take a long break? He needed a wheel-y good rest!
When I asked the bus driver for directions, it was a 'bus stop' service!
My Dad drove a truck for 32 years.
He was terrible with directions.
What is a car’s favourite colour?
Racing car green.
What do cars have on toast.
Butter and traffic jam.
What superhero takes public transportation to get around? Bus Lightyear.
I was gonna make some car puns...
but I ran out of gas.
What do you call unwanted revealing comments about a movie?
Spoilers.
Why did the bicycle fall over?
Because it was 2-tired.
What did the car call his new band?
Back Seat Boys.
My kid’s toy submarine was having trouble staying under water...
I hope this will not surface again
Why did the bus driver take a break? He needed to 'stop' and refuel!
What title did the car have in the Navy?
Rear window Admiral.
What is a car’s favourite sport?
Soc-car.
I banged my bike against the wall today. it was wheelie unfortunate.
What do you call a guy who only rides children's bicycles?
A pedalphile
A silent man walked into a bicycle shop...
He picked up a wheel and spoke.
I tried to make a wooden submarine.
It didn't go down so well.
I got arrested because I left my car at the bar and took the bus home.
It turned out I was in no condition to drive that either.
Every morning when I leave home, a bike comes from somewhere and runs me over. It’s a vicious cycle.
Read a story about two people who stole cars driving into each other.
Must have been Bonnie and Collide
Why did the bus driver quit his job? It was driving him mad.
Which bus went from Spain to America?
Columbus
Driving a truck carrying cutlery is easy – as soon as you see the fork in the road, you know you’re there.
Is the city bus running on time? No, it’s running on diesel.
What is a car’s favourite element?
Carbon.
I saw a lady riding a camel and being pulled by a truck...
It was a camel tow