Cosmetic Jokes

Medical Puns

People often stare at my back-alley cosmetic surgery to remove half of my brain...
I have half a mind to tell them where to go.

If anyone has any advice for cosmetic surgery that’s gone terribly wrong...
My wife is all ears.

Cosmetics Puns

What cosmetic does DNA put on?
Genetic makeup.

What do you call an East-European cosmetic?
Nail Polish.

Cosmetic surgery used to be such a taboo subject.
Now you can talk about Botox and nobody raises an eyebrow.