Funny News Headlines

Enjoy the funniest news headline one liners, most of which come from real newspapers!

Funny News Headlines

Miners Refuse to Work after Death.
Bodies Needed To Look After Graveyard
Federal Agents raid gun shop, find weapons
Bank Drive-in Window Blocked by Board
Milk Drinkers are Turning to Powder.
Man is Fatally Slain.
Stolen Painting Found By Tree
Two Convicts Evade Noose, Jury Hung
Deaf mute gets new hearing
Flashier Great Tits Produce Stronger Sperm, Bird Study Shows.
Gas rig men grilled by villagers - The Oxford Times
CRIME: Sheriff Asks For 13.7% Increase
Hospitals Are Sued By 7 Foot Doctors
Circumcision Now Seen As Pointless.
An Australian army vehicle worth $74,000 has gone missing after being painted with camouflage.
Stolen Prosthetic Arm Discovered in a Secondhand Shop.
Deaf Mute Gets New Hearing In Killing
Queen Mary Having Bottom Scraped
Arson Suspect is Held in Massachusetts Fire
Kicking Baby Considered Healthy
Killer Sentenced To Die For Second Time In Ten Years
Alzheimer's Center Prepares For An Affair To Remember.
Republicans Turned Off By Size Of Obama’s Package
Two Sisters Reunite after Eighteen Years at Checkout Counter.
Grandmother Of Eight Makes Hole In One
Dealers Will Hear Car Talk At Noon
Autos killing 110 a day, let's resolve to do better
County to Pay $250,000 to Advertise Lack of Funds
30 Year Friendship Ends At Alter
Death Causes Loneliness, Feeling Of Isolation
Crash courses for private pilots - The Daily Telegraph
Bodies in garden are a plant says wife
Hypochondriacs aren't OK
Juvenile Court Tries Shooting Defendant
Lawmen From Mexico Barbecue Guests
Smokers Are Productive, But Death Cuts Efficiency
Police Begin Campaign To Run Down Jaywalkers
Nicaragua Sets Goal to Wipe out Literacy.
Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
Chef Throws His Heart Into Helping Feed The Needy
Flat earthers fear 6 feet social distancing could push some people over the edge.
Is There A Ring Of Debris Around Uranus?
Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing
Filming in cemetery angers residents - The Evening Standard
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges.
British Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply
Four Battered In Fish And Chip Shop
Have your home exterminated. Get rid of aunts.
Foul Play Suspected In Death Of Man Found Handless, Bound And Hanged
Miners Refuse To Work After Death