Man: "I’ve had really bad gas lately." Doctor: D"on’t worry, it will pass."
The doctor told me I shouldn’t eat alphabet soup.
I suffer from irritable vowel syndrome.
The Doctor could tell right away the bucket was sick.
It was looking a bit pale.
Her name is Carly and she's a doctor
maybe I should C A Rly good doctor.
A guy walks into the doctors office complaining of rectal pain, upon examination, the doctor exclaims "Buddy, theres a piece of lettuce coming out of your butt!"
The guy looks to the doctor and says "thats only the tip of the iceburg!"
Doctor 1: what’s his body temperature?
Doctor 2: it’s 90 degrees.
Doctor 1: What?! That’s can’t be right!
Doctor 2: No, it is.
Earlier, I tried to sneak into the Star Trek convention disguised as the starship's doctor.
Security soon discoverd, however, I wasn't the real McCoy.
I dated a doctor once. Big mistake.
She was a Psycho.
There’s a new drama featuring herbivore doctors.
It’s called Graze Anatomy.
Doctor, Doctor! I'm terrified of words that are also letters!
Oh you are? I see. Why?
What did the frustrated doctor say to the nurse?
Gauze dammit!
Doctor: Your brain seems to have deleted all info about 80s music!
Man: Yikes! What’s The Cure?
Doctor: Darn, it’s worse than I thought.
“While I was in the doctor’s waiting room, there was this tiny man, only about six inches tall. Although he was there before me, he let me see the doctor first. I suppose he just had to be a little patient.”
What kind of doctor is always available?
An on-call-ogist.
Why did the house go to the doctor?
It was having window panes.
When I woke up from my accident, I was shocked when the doctors told me I broke all my fingers.
It was hard to grasp.
My doctor told me that his job is easy because he can heal all of his patients with trigonometry.
He has a sinecure.
The best way to a man's heart is through his stomach."
The surgeon was fired later that day.
Doctor: Are you aware of your sodium intake?
Me: Na.
Why was the doctor doing diarrhia research scared?
He had seen some sh*t go down.