What do you call a furniture store that is over 30 miles away?
The Sofa-r store
I stole two sofas from death, but I wasn’t ready for the reaper cushions.
What did the baseball player say when the flight attendant asked what seat he was in?
"Put me in coach."
I said to my doctor, "I usually sit on the computer 12 hours a day...is that bad?"
He replied, "That can't be too comfortable. Try a chair!"
What does a couch say to another couch at the other side of the room?
We are sofa apart!
How many drum sets can you store on a sofa?
One per cushion
Why does a milking chair only have three legs?
The cow has the udder.
When I heard my sofa had been stolen, I thought “I’m not going to take this sitting down”.
I'm never sure if I like rocking chairs or not.
I go back and forth on them
I love my furniture... Me and my recliner go way back.
My chair is missing an arm and a leg.
That doesn't sit well with me.
I was going to replace the seats at my bar
But... I just can't look at another stool sample
I'm moving some couches today...
Sofa, so good!
I've come up with a list of the top 10 types of specialized chairs.
Number 3 will shock you
Someone took my three-legged chair.
I guess it was stoolen
All the chairs in my town were stolen
The people can’t stand it.
What happens when you make love on a couch?
It becomes a sectional.
What do you call donating a chair?
Charity!
My office chair broke. It’s letting me down.
What do you call a chair in a suit?
A tuxSEATo
My chair finally broke down yesterday.
It just doesn't give a sit anymore.
I tried to build myself an armchair, but I messed up some of the measurements and made it too wide.
So near, and yet sofa
The salesman at the furniture store told me "This sofa will seat 5 people without any problems!"
To which I said, “Where on earth am I going to find 5 people without any problems?”
I couldn't chair less!
What do you do when you are in the wrong seat?
Stand corrected
What’s a farmer’s favorite piece of furniture?
a COWch.
My friend was bragging about his new L-shaped sofa, so I told him I had one too.
It's just lowercase.
I have some extra chairs in my garage for emergency seat-uations.
I'm studying the meaning of couches in different parts of the world.
It's really PhillySOFAcal.
My husband hated my impulse purchase of a revolving chair, but then he sat on it.
Eventually he came around.
My wife was a bit down so I decided to redecorate our living room.
Thought it would chair her up but sofa she haven't even noticed
I think a couch can endure many things, but if you take off its cushions, it would make it uncomfortable.