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Funny riddles

An Unsinkable Virgin
Riddle:
What do you call an unsinkable virgin?
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I Was Ripped Open By Something Long And Hard
Riddle:
I once let over 1000 different people inside me, until I was ripped open by something long and hard. What am I?
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You Use Your Hand To Whack Me Off
Riddle:
You use your hand to whack me off, the bigger I am, the louder I make people scream. What am I?
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Woman Had Two Cow Has Four…
Riddle:
What does a woman have two of that a cow has four of?
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I Assist With Erections…
Riddle:
I assist with erections. Sometimes, giant balls hang from me. I’m known as a big swinger. What am I?
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A Four-Letter Word That Ends In “K”
Riddle:
What’s a four-letter word that ends in “k” and means the same as intercourse?
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A Tree's Least Favorite Month
Riddle:
What month are trees scared of?
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Little Pumpkins
Riddle:
Who walks little pumpkins across the road to school?
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A Dialogue With the Ocean
Riddle:
What did the ocean say to the ship's captain?
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A Homesick Tree
Riddle:
What does a tree do when it gets homesick?
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When Leaves Begin to Turn
Riddle:
When do the leaves begin to turn?
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A Dogwood Tree
Riddle:
How can you tell a dogwood tree apart from other trees?
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A Fruit Tree
Riddle:
If fruit comes from a fruit tree, where does chicken come from?
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Does Rain Ever Get Up?
Riddle:
When rain falls, does it ever get up again?
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Jumping Animals
Riddle:
What animal can jump higher than a tree?
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All Bark and No Bite
Riddle:
I have lots of bark but no bite. What am I?
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Two Bats on a Date
Riddle:
What did the bat say to his date?
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Walnut and Almond
Riddle:
What did the walnut say as he was proposing to the almond?
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Valentine's Day For Singles
Riddle:
If you greet a couple on Valentine's Day with “Happy Valentines Day,” how would you greet a single person on February 14?
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Two Days in February
Riddle:
What did February 14 say to February 1?
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Train Valentines
Riddle:
What did one train say to his sweetheart on Valentine's day?
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Octopi in Love
Riddle:
What did the octopus say to his crush on Valentine's day?
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Valentine's Day with the Skunks
Riddle:
Skunks never skip Valentine’s Day, but why?
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Pickle Valentine
Riddle:
How did the pickle confess his love to his valentine?
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Lightbulbs in Love
Riddle:
What did one lightbulb say to the other lightbulb on Valentine's day?
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Romantic Oars
Riddle:
What did one oar say to the other on Valentine's day?
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A Small Valentine
Riddle:
What do you call a rather small Valentine?
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Chocolate Sauce and Ice Cream
Riddle:
What did the chocolate sauce confess to the ice cream?
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The Stamp and the Envelope
Riddle:
What did the envelope say to the stamp on Valentine’s Day?
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The Doctor and the Truck Driver
Riddle:
A truck driver and a doctor fell in love with the same woman. The truck driver had to go on a weekend trip. Before leaving, he gave the woman 2 apples. Why?
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