Funny riddles

An Unsinkable Virgin

Riddle:

What do you call an unsinkable virgin?
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I Was Ripped Open By Something Long And Hard

Riddle:

I once let over 1000 different people inside me, until I was ripped open by something long and hard. What am I?
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You Use Your Hand To Whack Me Off

Riddle:

You use your hand to whack me off, the bigger I am, the louder I make people scream. What am I?
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Woman Had Two Cow Has Four…

Riddle:

What does a woman have two of that a cow has four of?
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I Assist With Erections…

Riddle:

I assist with erections. Sometimes, giant balls hang from me. I’m known as a big swinger. What am I?
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A Four-Letter Word That Ends In “K”

Riddle:

What’s a four-letter word that ends in “k” and means the same as intercourse?
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A Tree's Least Favorite Month

Riddle:

What month are trees scared of?
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Little Pumpkins

Riddle:

Who walks little pumpkins across the road to school?
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A Dialogue With the Ocean

Riddle:

What did the ocean say to the ship's captain?
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A Homesick Tree

Riddle:

What does a tree do when it gets homesick?
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When Leaves Begin to Turn

Riddle:

When do the leaves begin to turn?
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A Dogwood Tree

Riddle:

How can you tell a dogwood tree apart from other trees?
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A Fruit Tree

Riddle:

If fruit comes from a fruit tree, where does chicken come from?
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Does Rain Ever Get Up?

Riddle:

When rain falls, does it ever get up again?
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Jumping Animals

Riddle:

What animal can jump higher than a tree?
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All Bark and No Bite

Riddle:

I have lots of bark but no bite. What am I?
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Two Bats on a Date

Riddle:

What did the bat say to his date?
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Walnut and Almond

Riddle:

What did the walnut say as he was proposing to the almond?
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Valentine's Day For Singles

Riddle:

If you greet a couple on Valentine's Day with “Happy Valentines Day,” how would you greet a single person on February 14?
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Two Days in February

Riddle:

What did February 14 say to February 1?
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Train Valentines

Riddle:

What did one train say to his sweetheart on Valentine's day?
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Octopi in Love

Riddle:

What did the octopus say to his crush on Valentine's day?
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Valentine's Day with the Skunks

Riddle:

Skunks never skip Valentine’s Day, but why?
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Pickle Valentine

Riddle:

How did the pickle confess his love to his valentine?
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Lightbulbs in Love

Riddle:

What did one lightbulb say to the other lightbulb on Valentine's day?
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Romantic Oars

Riddle:

What did one oar say to the other on Valentine's day?
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A Small Valentine

Riddle:

What do you call a rather small Valentine?
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Chocolate Sauce and Ice Cream

Riddle:

What did the chocolate sauce confess to the ice cream?
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The Stamp and the Envelope

Riddle:

What did the envelope say to the stamp on Valentine’s Day?
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The Doctor and the Truck Driver

Riddle:

A truck driver and a doctor fell in love with the same woman. The truck driver had to go on a weekend trip. Before leaving, he gave the woman 2 apples. Why?
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