"I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?"
"About 32," was the reply.
"Nope! I'm exactly 50," the woman said happily.
A little while later she went into McDonald's and asked the counter girl the very same question.
The girl said, "I guess about 29."
The woman replied, "Nope I'm 50."
Now she was feeling really good about herself. She stopped in a drug store on her way down the street. She went up to the counter to get some mints and asked the clerk this burning question.
The clerk responded, "Oh, I'd say 30."
Again she proudly responded, "I am 50, but thank you!"
While waiting for the bus to go home, she asked an old man waiting next to her the same question.
He replied, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eyesight is going...
"Although, when I was young, there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra. Then, and only then, can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are."
They waited in silence on the empty street until curiosity got the best of her.
She finally blurted out, "What the hell! Go ahead."
He slipped both of his hands under her bra and began to feel around very slowly and carefully. He bounced and weighed each one of her bosoms. He gently pinched them as well. He pushed her assets together and rubbed them against each other.
After a couple of minutes of this, she said, "Okay, okay...How old am I?"
He completed one last squeeze, removed his hands, and said, "Madam, you are 50."
Stunned and amazed, the woman said, "That was incredible! How could you tell??"
"I was behind you in line at McDonald's."
Hilarious: But Dad, I Have No Idea What to Do With Her
A newlywed couple are about to consummate their marriage as they're expected to, but neither of them have any idea what they're doing...
This Joke Starts With a Man Working Late
A businessman works late to be with his young secretary, but eventually makes his way home. He begins to think up his excuses...
Why Has It Gone Hard? (Hilarious Joke)
Two boys are playing by a stream when they see a naked woman. One of the boys quickly runs off.
Cheeky Joke: The Doctor and the Stutterer
Enjoy this funny joke about a guy who wanted his stutter removed...
This Joke Starts With a Man On His Deathbed
A man lies on his deathbed, surrounded by his wife and four children. Three are tall and athletic, but the fourth... isn't. He asks his wife about them...
This Joke Starts With a Christian Lady On a Business Trip
A Christian business lady is asked why she always carries her Bible with her. She begins to respond...
17 Unexpected Objects With Friendly Faces!
These smiling fungi and friendly dressers are here to lift your spirits!
These Photos Will Leave You Doing a Double-Take!
There are some photos that will just leave you doing a double-take thanks to their perfect timing and odd composition. Take a look at these 18 surreal photos.
Hilarious: The Funniest Memes This Christmas!
These hilarious Christmas memes will make your holiday season that much better.
Rowan Atkinson Gives a Most Hilarious Sermon!
Rowan Atkinson, the famous comedian, gives a sermon the likes of which you've never heard...
15 Funny Pictures of Pets Engaged in Shenanigans
These hilarious entries from the Comedy Pet Photography Awards will have you rolling in laughter.
Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2022: 16 Silly Winning Pics
The Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards are back! Here are the winning images from this year’s contest.
Excuse Me, But Are These Signs for REAL?!?
Who comes up with these hilarious ideas and useless ideas for signs?
Arrest These Designers! 20 Cases of Design Faux Pas
From ashtrays labelled with 'No Smoking' signs to lemons that can supposedly produce orange juice, you've got to see these 20 hilarious design fails!
The Most Outrageously Hilarious Signs You’ll See
You know what time it is? It’s time for some funny signs!
20 One-Frame Funnies That Will Make You Laugh
This New Yorker cartoonist's works are full of wit and humor.
These Dumb Actions By People Will Leave You Aghast
Some people do things that simply leave you scratching your head - and make you laugh. Take a look at 22 pictures of the dumbest actions you'll ever see.
HILARIOUS! The Heart versus the Brain, Who Beats Whom?
These comics put a cheerful twist on chores, work and responsibilities. You'll recognize yourself in these funny stories about the Heart & the Brain.
These Hilarious Signs Were Totally Unnecessary
Here are 12 photos that really capture the silly side of humanity!
For a Giant Smile, Check Out These Hilarious Cartoons!
If you love cartoon stripes then you came to the right place. Enjoy this collection of funny cartoons that are sure to make your day funnier and your step lighter.
These Photos Are so Ironic You'll Howl with Laughter!
The pictures you're about to see are so permeated with irony that they are scarcely believable. Here are 29 of the most ironic pictures you'll ever see.
It's Impossible Not to Laugh At These Funny Signs!
Who doesn't love a funny sign? This collection will leave you grinning from ear to ear.
Want a Laugh? Try These Witty Lines!
The best jokes and phrases are the ones that completely catch us off guard. Here are 14 very witty and unpredictable jokes and phrases.
These Birds Have Gone Crazy! Somebody Stop Them!
Enjoy this hilarious collection of the funniest bird videos.
The Hilarious Antics of These Birds Will Make You Chuckle
Birds can be mean at times, but hilarious at the same time. Check out some of the funniest bird antics in this post.
These Funny Restaurant Signs Will Have You Guffawing
The iconic Tex-Mex restaurant, El Arroyo is back with some more hilariously clever signs.
HILARIOUS: 20 Signs That Are Too Funny to Pass By
We could all use a bit of laughter these days, and what’s better than brilliantly funny signs?
Watch What Happens When Simon's Cat Gets Stuck in a Tree
What happens when Simon's Cat gets stuck in a tree? Hilarious!
Hilarious: Have You Seen The New Senior Bumper Stickers?
Here are some bumper stickers specially made for the retired lifestyle!
This Magician Pulls Off the Most Insane Tricks
Forget about pulling rabbits out of hats, this magician pulls off the most insane tricks.
Laugh Until You Howl: The WILDEST Animal Pranks
Have a roaring time with these howlarious wild animal pranks by Just for Laughs.
17 Hilarious Animal Memes That Will Have You Guffawing
Start your day with these ridiculously hilarious animal memes.
These Punny Illustrations Will Give You a Good Chuckle
Enjoy this collection of illustrated puns by artist Teo Zirinis.
Ready For Fun? Time for a Gag-Fest!
This gag collection is sure to put a smile on your face today. What's life without a bit of laughter?
Want to See Something Funny? This Prank is Hilarious
This prank begins with a window cleaner taking off some clothes...
These Inventors Thought Outside the Box! Hilarious
These creators came up with some pretty hilarious inventions.
Classic Comedy: Why Michelangelo Didn't Do the Last Supper
One of the lesser known sketches of the famous Monty Python is a hoot and a half - explaining why Michelangelo didn't paint the last supper.
Hilarious: When It's Just Not Your Day...
These photos show spectacularly awful things that can happen to anyone. Let’s hope there was someone to give them a big hug afterwards.
Sea Lions Aren’t as Cute and Clumsy as They May Seem
The incredible hunting skills and abilities of the sea lion
These Witty Responses to Public Notices are Hilarious
Check out this collection of 15 petty notices along with their extremely hilarious responses!
I Love Laughing at Clever Cartoons, Don't You?
from religion to family to funny situations, you'll surely find something to raise that smile in these funny cartoons.
Classic Comedy: Mrs. Brown and Her Naughty Situation (Rude)
We come back to our favorite foul mouthed lady in this hilarious sketch.This will definitely get you laughing!
Hilarious: They'll Never Notice if I Take Just One Piece...
Watch how these sneaky pooches get caught stealing food. You'll laugh so hard you'll cry!
Hilarious! What It Truly Means to Be a Grandparent
These Hilarious quotes by Gene Perret perfectly sum up life as a grandparent.