"I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?"
"About 32," was the reply.
"Nope! I'm exactly 50," the woman said happily.
A little while later she went into McDonald's and asked the counter girl the very same question.
The girl said, "I guess about 29."
The woman replied, "Nope I'm 50."
Now she was feeling really good about herself. She stopped in a drug store on her way down the street. She went up to the counter to get some mints and asked the clerk this burning question.
The clerk responded, "Oh, I'd say 30."
Again she proudly responded, "I am 50, but thank you!"
While waiting for the bus to go home, she asked an old man waiting next to her the same question.
He replied, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eyesight is going...
"Although, when I was young, there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra. Then, and only then, can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are."
They waited in silence on the empty street until curiosity got the best of her.
She finally blurted out, "What the hell! Go ahead."
He slipped both of his hands under her bra and began to feel around very slowly and carefully. He bounced and weighed each one of her bosoms. He gently pinched them as well. He pushed her assets together and rubbed them against each other.
After a couple of minutes of this, she said, "Okay, okay...How old am I?"
He completed one last squeeze, removed his hands, and said, "Madam, you are 50."
Stunned and amazed, the woman said, "That was incredible! How could you tell??"
"I was behind you in line at McDonald's."
This Joke Starts With a Man Working Late
A businessman works late to be with his young secretary, but eventually makes his way home. He begins to think up his excuses...
Joke: Lights Go Out, Naughty Comes Out...
Four people are in a train compartment together when everything goes dark. An opportunistic poor man decides to capitalize on the opportunity...
Hilarious: The Best of Little Johnny Jokes!
I'm always partial to a good Little Johnny joke, but when there's a collection of them in one place, you know there'll be people falling about laughing...
Joke: To Heaven and Back
A woman suffers a heart attack and ends up in hospital. She has a near-death experience, but awakens. She decides to get some work done...
This Joke Starts With a Middle-aged Lady Going to Hospital
A woman suffers a heart attack and ends up in hospital. She has a near-death experience, but awakens. She decides to get some work done...
Receptionist, You Must Come Quickly (Hilarious Joke)
A receptionist is alerted to the presence of a man outside the window of an old lady who's staying at the hotel. She goes to investigate the problem...
Laugh Out Loud at These 15 Epic Design Fails
When it comes to terrible ideas, the human race often ends up coming out on top as these photos prove!
Hilarious: The Marriage Dictionary!
Have you been through the marriage dictionary yet? I think you'll find that the definitions it contains are much different to the ones in a regular dictionary.
Classic Comedy: That's Not How You Use Glue, Mrs. Brown!
Mrs. Brown is one of the funniest characters to ever grace the television screen, and when she makes a sticky mistake, you won't stop laughing.
Hilarious: When Timing and Comedy Team Up!
Comedy is all about timing and these photos are the perfect example for it!
Hilarious: Mr. Bean is Looking for Something...
Leave it to Mr. Bean to make it a hilarious search!
Hilarious: 16 of the FUNNIEST DIY Repair Jobs!
These ridiculously funny DIY fixes will crack you up!
These Wedding Day Pranks Will Leave You Gasping For Air
Hilarious wedding pranks that are guaranteed to make you laugh.
13 Funny Palindromes That Will Make You Giggle
People have been enjoying palindromes for centuries - here are 13 funny examples that are sure to make crack you up.
Ah the Hilarious Ways We Men Try to Solve Our Problems
When it comes to health and safety, these men have left their brains at home. Faced with some tricky challenges, they have tried to solve them in funny ways.
I Love Reading These Funny Lines!
There's a grain of truth in every joke. And even as we laugh, the humor helps us remember some truths. Of course, sometimes a funny line... is just a funny line!
These Funny One-Liners Are Utterly Hilarious
These monsters are out to make you giggle. They've got no less than 20 one-liners to share with you, and we bet you'll be in fits of laughter in no time.
Comedy Classics: Christmas Shopping With Mr. Bean
This Christmas, let’s go shopping with Mr. Bean.
Hilarious! Quick, Your Majesty, Avoid Mr. Bean!
It's hard to imagine why the Queen would ever want to meet Mr. Bean. I mean, I know he's funny, but...she's the Queen! This will not end well!
Hilarious: These Animals Decided to be Jerks Today
Animals are lovely, but even they have the scoundrels that annoy the rest!
This Amusing Prank Involves a Frying Pan...
This prank video starts with a pan falling from up high...
Australia, the Unpredictable - 21 Sidesplitting Photos!
As these hilarious pictures prove, there's an equal number of pleasant surprises are terrifying encounters in Australia. You just never know what to expect...
Hilarious: 15 Who Parked Terribly and Found Karma
Some people just don't know how to park a care, and some are just incredibly selfish. Here are the worst offenders.
Hilarious: Some Guys REALLY Think Outside the Box...
Here are some of my favorite examples of male creativity at work.
Hilarious: Nice People Are Easily Duped!
A collection of hilarious pranks relying on the kindness of good samaritans who are about to go through some bizarre experiences...
These Dumb Actions By People Will Leave You Aghast
Some people do things that simply leave you scratching your head - and make you laugh. Take a look at 22 pictures of the dumbest actions you'll ever see.
These Cartoons Will Make You Laugh and Think...
This artist has an incredible knack for capturing the ironies and paradoxes arising from the use of technology in the modern world. View his illustrations here.
Add Humor to Your Bathroom With These Crazy Curtains
Add a touch of humor to your bathroom with these crazy shower curtains.
The Famous Sketch that Made Millions Laugh!
Monty Python performed loads of hilarious sketches, but only this one gets me out of my chair and secretly practicing my own silly walks!
Hilarious: 16 Sarcastic Daily Affirmations!
Sometimes, being overly positive doesn’t help. But a little bit of humor does.
These Are the Funniest Signs I've Seen in a While...
These hilarious signs required some devious minds behind them...
You Wouldn't Believe These Things Happen at Hotels
These hotel fails are the funniest things you will see all day.
20 Funny Signs That Prove Churches Have a Sense of Humor
These hilarious signs show the funny side of the Christian religion.
These Funny Restaurant Signs Just Made Me Laugh Out Loud
Enjoy this collection of hilarious restaurant signs.
Parrots Are So Funny: A Hilarious Compilation!
This video compilation is all about funny parrots and how they make you laugh.
20 Hilarious Supermarket Mistakes You've Got to See!
I used to think shopping was boring, until I started noticing these hilarious mistakes all over the place. Here are 20 of the funniest fails I've seen.
These Signs Are Way Too Funny!
You know what time it is? It’s time for some hilariously funny sign!
This is One of the Funniest Videos I've Ever Seen! (Cheeky)
This hilarious short video is just laugh out loud funny.
It's Not Fun Being Old, But Sometimes It's Funny...
Let me make your day with these photos that made almost made me spill my coffee this morning.
These Truly Outrageous Sights Can Only be Found in Russia!
If you're a huge fan of all things weird and wonderful, then there's no better place for you to visit than Russia. Here's why...
These Funny Quotes Will Inspire You With a Smile
Let these humorous quotes about life put a smile on your face.
No Object is Safe From These Grumpy Cats!
No object is safe from these cats! In this hilarious video, you'll see cats attacking vacuum attachments, pushing things off tables, and much more!
20 Funny Quotes for All the Introverts Out There
Do you identify yourself as an introvert? Then you will relate to these hilarious quotes.