Defense Attorney: Will you please state your age?
Little Old Lady: I am 86 years old.
Defense Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st?
Little Old Lady: There I was, sitting in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.
Defense Attorney: Did you know him?
Little Old Lady: No, but he sure was friendly.
Defense Attorney: What happened after he sat down?
Little Old Lady: He started to rub my thigh.
Defense Attorney: Did you stop him?
Little Old Lady: No, I didn’t stop him.
Defense Attorney: Why not?
Little Old Lady: It felt good. Nobody had done that to me since my Albert died some 30 years ago.
Defense Attorney: What happened next?
Little Old Lady: He began to rub my breasts.
Defense Attorney: Did you stop him then?
Little Old Lady: No, I did not stop him.
Defense Attorney: Why not?
Little Old Lady: It made me feel alive. I haven’t felt that good in years!
Defense Attorney: What happened next?
Little Old Lady: Well, by then, I was feeling a little hot and bothered, so I asked him to come closer.
Defense Attorney: And did he?
Little Old Lady: Well, he came closer.... and then yelled, “April Fools!”
And that’s when I shot the moron."
Scroll below for more funny jokes!
Joke: Driving By the Numbers
An old lady is spotted driving very slowly on a highway by a policeman who promptly pulls her over. The problem soon becomes apparent...
This Joke Starts At a Murder Trial In Oklahoma
A murder trial gets underway in Oklahoma, but it isn't long before things get weird. For one, there's no body, and the defense lawyer is rather creative...
Hilarious: When a Spot of Generosity Goes Unappreciated
While a woman is praying to God in order to retrieve her stolen money, some post office workers think that they're doing a really good deed.
Joke: A Thieving Old Lady Finds Herself Facing a Judge
An old lady finds herself in front of a judge after stealing a can of peaches. He immediately hands down a sentence for her wicked deed...
It's My Birthday, I'll Have a Drink If I Want To (Funny)
An old lady is celebrating her 80th birthday aboard a cruise ship. The bartender buys her a drink, and she proceeds to have a few...
Funny Photos: These Delivery Men Have an Odd Way of Working
We all enjoy getting a package in the mail, don't we? It's not always so straightforward though. These 20 delivery fails well have you laughing out loud.
Hilarious: Rowan Atkinson Welcomes You to Hell
Watch this hilarious British comedian's take on the devil introducing new sinners to hell.
It’s Hard to Believe These Hilarious US Laws Still Exist!
Did you know California prohibits riding bikes in swimming pools? Discover more such bizarre US laws in this article.
George Carlin Had a Funny Way of Telling the Truth!
Mr George Carlin's legacy will be fondly remembered for many years. There are not many people who can entertain, amuse, and delight by asking a simple question.
Australia, the Unpredictable - 21 Sidesplitting Photos!
As these hilarious pictures prove, there's an equal number of pleasant surprises are terrifying encounters in Australia. You just never know what to expect...
15 Witty and Funny Marathon Signs That Made Us Chuckle
These absolutely wacky, witty, and hilarious signs were spotted at the NYC Marathon.
If I Can’t Hug Them, Then Why Are These Animals SO CUTE?
These are the last animals you’d think of as ‘cute,’ yet here they are, looking as silly and precious as our beloved pets.
Hilarious: The Wackiest Car Designs I've Ever Seen...
These car owners sure know how to make their vehicles stand out on the streets.
In the Mood for a Good Laugh? Take a Look at These Photos
From a deer being interviewed to a waterproof laptop, this list has got it all!
These Funny Photos Show Victorian Era in a Different Light!
Most images we see from the early days of photography are austere and often bleak. Yet these photographs show the reality. People were cheeky, funny and happy!
Hilarious: These Cheesy Puns Will Make You Giggle!
These cheesy puns will have your family and friends cringing first, and tittering with laughter second. Enjoy there 20 cheesy puns that are made to share.
Hilarious Stand Up: Why Teens Are God's Revenge
A hilarious stand up by comedian veteran Jeff Allen, all about teens and why they are God's revenge.
Here Are Some Funny New Year's Quotes to Make You Laugh
We want you to welcome 2023 with laughter. So, here are some hilarious News Year quotes for you.
Winter Can Be CRAZY Sometimes - 16 Bizarre Pics
These chilly pictures show just how crazy and harsh winter can be.
Cats Have An Innate Ability to Be Really Naughty..
If you have a cat, you know that they can be partial to behaving like jerks sometimes. This is especially true in the 19 hilarious photos you're about to see.
The Funny Realities of New Year's Resolutions
New Year’s Resolutions can be fun or annoying depending on the way you look at them. These funny comic strips take a dig at the tradition.
These 15 Hilariously Naughty Pets Were Caught in the Act
These 15 hilarious pets were caught red-pawed and made to pay for their “crimes” by wearing signs of their wrongdoings.
Classic Comedy: The Quick-Witted Quips of Groucho Marx
Enjoy this collection of witty responses and jokes from Groucho Marx on his game show "You Bet Your Life" from the 1950s.
Kidding in the Rain: A Collection of Rainy-Day Pranks!
A hilarious collection of pranks by just for laughs focusing on rainy days.
14 Cat Fails That Definitely Won't Fail to Make You Laugh
If you're searching for pictures of cats who have immediately regretted their poor choices, you need look no further. Check out these hilarious cat fails.
It's Not Fun Being Old, But Sometimes It's Funny...
Let me make your day with these photos that made almost made me spill my coffee this morning.
When Two Old Ladies Sit Down and Make Us Laugh!
Hilarious and classic sketch from the Mrs. Brown classic show.
Here Are 14 of the World's Funniest Bumper Stickers
14 funny and clever bumper stickers that will brighten up your day.
Cats vs. Printers - The Great Rivalry!
Printers may not know this, but cats have a real problem with them. It may be the odd noises, or the audacity they have of pushing pages out without getting the cat's consent prior to the fact, but whatever it is, cats don't like them, and will fight
When Kid Photos Don't Come Out the Way You Hoped...
Click to see the outcome of kids who did not want to have their photos taken.
Hilarious: A Most Unusual Sermon!
Rowan Atkinson, the famous comedian, gives a sermon the likes of which you've never heard...
It's Impossible Not to Laugh At These Funny Signs!
Who doesn't love a funny sign? This collection will leave you grinning from ear to ear.
Hilarious - The World’s MOST Useless Inventions!
These inventions solve problems that don't exist!
HILARIOUS: 15 Times People Failed the Only Job They Had
The most hilarious examples of hilarious work fails.
These Guys Have Some WEIRD Choices in Christmas Sweaters!
Some people just have bizarre tastes when it comes to Christmas sweaters.
These Comics Prove a Single Panel Can Deliver Big Laughs
Enjoy this hilarious collection of single-panel comics by Adam Douglas Thompson.
WARNING: These Signs Will Make You Howl with Laughter
Here, we present to you the best and funniest signs we've seen so far this year, enjoy!
Collection - Design Fails & Construction Mistakes
An enormous collection of terrible design and construction mistakes.
Only Mr. Bean Can Make a Picnic Hilarious
Mr. Bean decides to have a picnic. However, he soon realizes that there are some insects who will do their utmost to prevent him from enjoying himself...
These Animal Pick Up Lines Are a Hoot!
When it comes to pick up lines, the animal world provides some of the funniest! This collection of 70 animal pick up lines is gonna make you roar with laughter.
Hilarious: Mother Versus Father, Who Does it Better?
When it comes to parenting, who does it better, mothers or fathers?
This Christmas, Spend Some Laughs with Mr. Bean
Enjoy your Christmas with this hilarious Mr. Bean episode.
These Illustrated Pet Confessions Just Got Me Laughing
These pet confessions show what your pets are really thinking about, with a great dose of humor!
Hilarious: Old Ladies Know How to Ask the Best Questions...
Old ladies have some of the most poignant and relevant questions to ask of any of us. Here are a few of them!
Funny Photos: You Had One Job!
These ridiculously funny work fail pictures will have you laughing all day.